The Pines Triplets
by FlamingFlyingFoxOfDoom
Summary: Siblings: Dipper, Mabel and Bill (otherwise known as Bip) go to their Great Uncle's place for the summer. What happens during this vacation may put the entire world, let alone their family, at risk.
1. Chapter 1

**Tourist Trapped**

First summer away from home and they had to spend it at some eccentric uncle's house. They've already been there for a few days, and the brothers already expected something to be off. They figured the sister knew as well, however she was less… worried, about it.

The triplets were two boys and a girl, who all shared a startling physical likeness to one another. Bip (the youngest of the three by about fifteen minutes) had a rather free-spirited hairstyle that focused the majority of his hair to a wild entanglement on the left side of his face. On his right cheek, he had three moles located in a slightly triangular formation. His choice of clothing also left much to be discussed. The basic outfit composed of a windbreaker placed over tank tops of various colors and styles on top of black shorts (placed over his khakis) and bathroom slippers which also varied in colors and styles. At the first glance, you expect the youngest to have the most in common with the most-commonly-associated-with-quirks of the oldest sibling (by about 5 minutes), Mabel. And although the two certainly share traits and interests, there was plenty to draw similarities to the other brother, Dipper.

The weirdness officially began one day in the Shack's gift shop, where their Great Uncle (or Grunkle) Stan decided he needed some signs placed randomly in the woods in order to get some more potential customers to his tourist trap. Wendy the cashier had bluntly stated no while Soos the handyman had come up with a bizarre reason to avoid it. So it was up to one of the triplets to partake in the rather irrelevant task.

The three of them were lined up, looking up at Stan with varied expressions. Mabel's was mainly of curiosity, Dipper's of a subtle plea to not be chosen for the job, and Bip's mainly of annoyance.

"Let's see…" The elderly man mumbled, eyeing the children. "Eenie, Meenie, Minie-" he pointed to each of the siblings as he moved on to each new word, but spontaneously back peddled and pointed to Dipper. "You."

"What?" Dipper exclaimed "Grunkle Stan, shouldn't you have pointed to Mabel next?"

"I should've but I didn't." Stan grinned, spinning his cane. He shoved an armful of signs into the boy's noticeably smaller noodle arms. "Here, go put these up."

"Woo!" Mabel cheered "Not me!"

"Sucks to be you, DipDop." Bip chuckled under his breath.

"Bip, go with him." Stan said bluntly, starting to leaf through the day's profits.

"What? Why?" Bip muttered.

"Because I said so, that's why! Go on!" Stan grumbled, pointing out the door. Dipper bestowed a smug smirk to his brother which was retaliated with a (rather comedic) pout of rage. Bip took about half of the signs (and the hammer. Dipper carried the nails) and then the two went along their way.

After the short-lived tension between them withered away, Dipper muttered:

"Hey, Bip? You've noticed how weird this town is, haven't you?"

Bip rolled his eyes "You'd have to be flippin' blind not to. I mean, your bug bites spell 'Bewarb'."

Dipper flushed "Bewarb? I thought it said beware-" he checked his arm quickly and muttered under his breath at the confirmation of his brother's statement. "Well- it's still weird."

"Yeah. Obviously the bugs either don't know how to spell or have horrible team coordination." Bip muttered.

"Come on, Bip! Take this seriously!" Dipper snapped.

"Alright, alright. No more joking for the next five or so minutes. Yeah, I've noticed this town is flippin' weird." He absent-mindedly nailed a sign to a random tree "There's an oddly-shaped hole in the cliff-side and everyone is suspiciously dumb."

"I know, right!?" Dipper said, adjusting a sign to tack onto another tree. "and Grunkle Stan doesn't seem to even notice all this?"

"Well maybe he's dumb too." Bip shrugged. He handed Dipper the hammer.

"I guess." Dipper muttered, taking said hammer as his brother picked up the remaining signs "But I guess it'd be hard to be a con-man when you're stupid though."

He lightly tapped the nail to tree and at the odd metallic sound, cast Bip a glance. The two exchanged glances for a brief moment, and then Bip slowly placed his ear onto the tree and gave it a light knock. He backed up, staring at the trunk with a rather confused expression. Dipper went ahead and hit the strange tree with the hammer a few more times when suddenly a panel slid open.

Bip eyed the strange lever that was in the tree, a troubling suspicion bubbling up from the bottom of his stomach. Dipper pulled the level down, clearly troubled but still curious. A low _creak_ was heard as another panel crept open. The brothers quickly found the in-ground hatch to which Dipper was completely fascinated by. He reached down and picked up the dust-covered book hidden within.

With theatrical preciseness, he wiped off the dust on the cover. The two boys saw their reflection on the gleaming six-fingered hand pasted to the front. A sprawling number three engraved it.

"A journal?" Dipper's eyes were huge as he flipped through the pages. "Bip, look at this! This is-" He was cut off by a sentence written in frantic scrawl.

 _Trust No One!_

Bip's eyes narrowed. "What do you think that means?"

Dipper shrugged, his eyes scanning the page. "Apparently something was after the author and had to hide." He clicked a pen a few times "But who IS the author?"

"Who is the author of what?" The spontaneous question of the sister caused both of the high-strung boys to jump. "Woah, calm down. Hey what are you looking at?" Mabel peered between her brothers.

The two boys exchanged glances. Bip gave a slight, indifferent shrug and Dipper sighed, looking around. "Let's go somewhere else to talk." He said.

The three went back to their room in the shack, each on their respective beds. Bip's was a hammock hastily tied to the main beam on the ceiling, as it is apparently their great uncle hadn't put much thought into the room until a day or two before they arrived and therefore had no time to put in a third bed. Bip was content enough with the hammock though, being accustomed to the top bunk and more often than not falling out of bed.

He swung lazily on it as he listened to Dipper explain to Mabel about how they found the strange journal in the woods. For some reason he couldn't explain, he felt and odd sense of dread at the book. Maybe it was just that is was an unnerving mysterious thing he found in the woods- Yeah. He dismissed it as that. Near the end of Dipper's spiel, Mabel got particularly restless, clearly trying her best to listen to Dipper but incredibly excited to share her own news.

"So what's up with you?" Bip asked, peering over to his sister from the edge of his hammock.

"Okay!" Mabel grinned "Time to spill the beans!" she lightly knocked over an empty can that was on the floor for some reason, adding her own sound effect of 'boop'! "This girl's got a date!"

"Wait, you got a boyfriend in the half hour Bip and I were gone?" Dipper snorted.

"Yep!" Mabel grinned.

"You go, girl!" Bip said, high-fiving his sister. He batted his lashes "Who's the lucky gentleman?"

Mabel opened her mouth to respond when she was interrupted by the doorbell ringing. She giggled hysterically "Oh, that's probably him! Come on guys, come meet him!" she twirled to the door "Race you down the stairs!"

Bip rolled his eyes at Dipper's rather unenthusiastic retort. As ungracefully as possible, he then flopped out of his bed, did a face-plant onto the floor, quickly recovered, and dragged his brother out the door and after their sister.

At the door with Mabel was a rather… unique, looking teenager with a rather large hoodie named 'Norman'. Dipper clearly regarded him with disgust, Mabel with awe and Bip with, well, annoyance. When the two left, Dipper decided to follow them around with a camera to collect evidence on Norman's oddness. Bip decided to not care and rocked a bit on his hammock, staring at the ceiling.

He could feel it coming on again, that stinging pain in his skull. It started the same way they all did, near the center of his brain and then exploding outwards like glass shards. Bip grinded his teeth, curling over and clutching at his head. Shaking, he breathed in broken and wavering breaths. As always, everything became so crisp, so clear. He could hear everything, see everything... and damn did it hurt. Bip's fingers dug deep into his hair, clawing at his scalp. He could feel the skin break and small pools blood pool around his fingers, and as he came in contact with it he could feel the cells and the little bacteria, the elements, the atoms, the electrons. They all swirled on his fingertips and his mind felt as if it were about to burst just from that. But as it is, his mind's eye raced back in time, reading the story of everything in contact with him and in contact with the things he was in contact with and so on.

 _Open the Portal._

It was too much. There were too many faces, too many noises, too many… senses. A sharp intake of breath renewed the pain, like slamming a sledge hammer onto a stake. Once again, he gritted his teeth and curled himself into a tighter wad on his hammock. It was… a bit worse than he was used to. A bit harder to think- No, no that wasn't it.

 _Open the Portal, Open the Portal._

It was too easy to think.

 _ **OpenthePortal OpenthePortal OpenthePortal**_

He was suddenly able to make inferences he didn't knew possible. What was an atom made of? Simple to say now. Envision another color? Sure thing, his favorite was ultraviolet. Will humans ever make space colonies? Yeah, the one on Mars won't last long, the water is bad.

Bip tried to tear himself away from thinking like that. He knew the deeper her got into it, the harder it was to get out. One time he was out for a few days, and what he knew as 'the hangover' was torture on its own. With a great amount of will, he focused his attention on his immediate surroundings. He could hear Grunkle Stan conning people in the Shack, he could hear the pages of Wendy's magazine turning. Somewhere outside, he could hear Dipper-

No, that was too far away. Reel it back. Pay attention.

There was blood on his hands. He pried an eye open to study his fingertips. In the back of his mind, he knew Mabel would be worried.

That conscious thought set off a chain reaction. Mabel would be worried, she'd ask him what's wrong and would probably pester him. Dipper would jump to some wild conclusion and start pursuing it relentlessly, and probably will get himself hurt in the process. Then Mabel would be even MORE worried and might cry and then Dipper would be upset and then they'll both be depressed and then and thenandthenandthen-

Bip fell out of his hammock.

With a moan, he rubbed his head. Well, that one was worse than usual, but at least he got out of it. He took a moment to make sure he was well-grounded to reality, feeling along the floor boards and tracing their origins back as far as he could.

Nothing.

He sighed in relief, slouching as he simply thought 'it's wood'. Slowly he got up and stretched upward and stretched his arms out, his fingers interlacing. His head hurt. Not because he was seeing too much anymore, now it was just a normal migraine. He took a deep breath. It was alright, it was alright. He was himself again.

 _Open The Portal._

Bip walked over to the mirror in the room and put his hands on his hips, practicing a grin.

 _Open The Portal._

He stretched his legs out and ran shaking fingers through his hair.

 _Open the Portal._

"Bip!" Dipper's voice was downstairs, and the sound of his footsteps rang against his brother's aching skull. Bip allowed himself only a moment to cringe. Moving quickly yet silently, he rolled onto Mabel's bed and kept his feet busy by kicking the wall. He made show of looking surprised when Dipper showed up, as if he had been tuning the world out. When ironically, it was the exact opposite.

Dipper had hastily explained his suspicion of Norman being a zombie, sitting on his bed and rewinding over and over through his evidence. A tone of resentment in his voice as he told of explaining his theory and how Mabel had in turn, turned on him, and how Soos had not believed him either. Bip didn't go out of his way to tell him he saw all of that. It hurt too much to think about, it was much easier to just accept what his brother told him as truth.

"I'm telling you, Bip. There's just something not right with Norman." Dipper said.

"That name bugs me." Bip mumbled "It's like a conjunction of 'normal' and 'human'."

"Exactly!" Dipper exclaimed, his eyes darted back to his camera "It's suspicious."

Bip rolled his eyes, "You think EVERYTHING is suspicious-" his sentence was cut off by Dipper's yelp of exclamation. "Hey, don't scream at me." Bip muttered, "It's true."

"No, Bip!" Dipper yelled, shoving the camera's screen in his face "Look!" On the screen the two boys observed a rather happy looking Mabel standing next to Norman who had put his arm around her. Suddenly the odd teen's hand fell off and he nonchalantly leaned over and put it back in his sleeve.

"Do you know what this means?" Dipper gasped. Bip nodded, making a small noise to indicate he did.

"NORMAN IS-"

"-A zombie!" "-A group of gnomes!" Dipper and Bip exclaimed at the same time. Dipper quickly gave Bip a rather annoyed glare. The triangle-faced brother thought a moment, tilting his head to the side. He shook his head and gave an awkward smile.

"Actually, zombie makes more sense."

Dipper rolled his eyes. Then suddenly his eyes widened and he suddenly dragged Bip toward him by his collar. "THAT THING IS OUT THERE WITH OUR SISTER!"

The two boys immediately took action. They sprinted down from the attic and after receiving a shovel, bat, and golf cart from Soos and Wendy they were speeding on their way to save their sister. Bip armed himself with the baseball bat and jumped out of the cart before it came to a full stop as he and Dipper took a turn to answer Mabel's distressed yell. The two quickly sprinted down the path, Dipper grabbing the shovel as they did so. They broke through the clearing and found Mabel surrounded by….gnomes.

"Gnomes?" Dipper blinked, confused. Bip shot him a smug look. Dipper's face flushed and he quickly stammered "W-we'll save you Mabel!"

And they did. It took some severe beating with blunt instruments, a golf cart and a leaf blower, but the brothers managed to save their sister and she managed to save them. The triplets, tired and messy, went into the gift shop of their uncle's shack. Stan, in a rare act of kindness, allowed the children to take one item from the shop. Dipper chose a hat to replace the one he had lost, and was quite content with it, admiring himself in the mirror. Mabel confused everyone again and claimed a grappling hook for her own. Bip tilted his head to the side and scanned the assorted items, scrunching up his face as he thought. Nothing in the room really interested him, but Stan was being kind for once, so he wanted to take advantage of it…

He shrugged and picked up one of the small 'Mystery Boxes' on the shelf. "This thing." He grinned.

"That's a huge rip-off, kid." Stan rolled his eyes.

"Yeah but maybe it's not." Bip and Mabel said almost simultaneously. They grinned at each other. Dipper rolled his eyes and muttered:

"Seriously Bip, it's probably something horrible."

"You don't know that!" Bip and Mabel's voices echoed each other. The two shared a giggle.

Stan sighed in annoyance "No point in it, Dipper. The two made up their minds." Dipper sighed in defeat.

That night, after Dipper was finish scribbling something down in the journal and Mabel was finished breaking stuff with the grappling hook, Bip stared at the ceiling in the dark. He was always an insomniac, always found it so hard to sleep. He huffed and rolled off his hammock but landed lightly onto the floor as to not wake his siblings. Silently he left the room, passing the tiny red box on the shelf on his way out. In the dark, he stared at it a little bit and then rolled his eyes.

Yeah, Dipper was probably right and it was probably nothing interesting, but he took the box with him downstairs. In his pajamas he sat on the recliner with only the standing lamp illuminating the darkness. Uncaringly, he pried apart the cardboard to find the object hidden inside. He tilted his head. It wasn't…horrible, but it certainly wasn't something too interesting. It was just a cheap little snow globe made of plastic with glitter flickering around. The plastic it was made of was dark and in a way, if you reached for threads and had a very active imagination, it looked like the night sky.

Bip shrugged and put the snow globe on the dinosaur skull next to the couch and decided to spend the night watching TV.

 **Is Bip an OC? I don't think he is technically, and I'm sure you all get what's going on. I'm just really afraid people are gonna dismiss this story as a lame OC insert.**

 **Post- AN Short:**

Stan yawned and walked into the living room not-really-early in the morning, holding a cup of coffee and scratching himself. He walked over to his recliner and took a sip of his coffee, glaring at Bip, who had curled up on the couch like a kitten. The TV was still on, blaring a marathon of Ducktective. Stan, in all his curiosity, sat on the T-rex skull and watched it for a bit, and then watched the next episode, and the next, and the next, and the next…

And he was still watching it when Soos and Wendy had come in for work that day. Needless to say, The Mystery Shack was closed for the day due to technical success.


	2. Chapter 2

**The Legend of the Gobblewonker**

 _Latrop eht nepo._

 _Latrop eht nepo._

 _Latrop eht nepo._

"Hey Bip!"

 _Who is it?_

 _Sounds like Mabel…_

 _Rats Gnitoohs_

 _Should I wake up?_

 _Tnavelerri._

 _Latrop eht si erehw?_

"Bip!"

His eyes snapped open, a light veil of sweat slicked on his forehead. Morning light filtered in through the attic window, casting long shadows through the naturally lit room. He lied on his back, one arm draped over her stomach and one leg dangling over the edge of his hammock. Slowly, as if he was still half-asleep, he rolled onto his side and peered over the edge. Mabel looked up at him, her head slightly tilted to one side and a small frown on her face.

"You okay there?" she said.

Bip forced a yawn "Yeah, I'm fine!" he lower his voice to a mutter, faking a pout "I just got woken up early is all."

Mabel giggled at that. She laughed for a bit and then beamed up at him, her braces reflecting the light uncomfortably into his face. "Well come down for breakfast! We're having a syrup race!"

"Will do, sister." Bip grinned. He waved Mabel off as she twirled and skipped off to the kitchen, yelling the declaration of her brother's awakening. Bip continued to force the grin until Mabel was out of all of his senses. Slowly, as her words faded to murmurs, Bip's façade broke. He rolled off the hammock and onto the floor, landing on his hands and knees. For a moment, he just stared at his fingers through wavering vision. His head spun in his skull and the ground rocked underneath him. Slowly getting up, he felt the crash of vertigo and the splitting pain through his skull. His lungs stopped working for a moment, and with a conscious effort he forced himself to breath.

This is what he'd like to call The Hangover. Now he's never had alcohol, and therefore never had a hangover, but he imagined from what he's seen on TV it was something like this. It probably wasn't longer than a minute, but it felt so much longer. When he was confident he could do his toothy grin without giving away his pain, he strode down stairs to his siblings, and just hoped with all of his heart that nothing too tiring happened that day.

…

Of course he was wrong.

(Insert Theme Song Here)

The triplets all shared the same look of dismay as Stan explained the day's plans. Luckily they were given a bail-out option by none other than Soos. After an episode of local cook McGucket about the rare and elusive 'Gobblewonker', the triplets were faced with the decision to either accompany Soos on an epic monster hunt or to spend a boring day with Stan.

"Monster hunt! Monster hunt!" Dipper and Mabel chanted. A few chants in and they realized their brother wasn't cheering along. A bit awkwardly, the two trailed off and stared at Bip for a moment. Bip's head was already hurting with the idea of getting on the boat. His expression showed to his siblings and to Soos that he was not super excited about the idea of an exciting day.

Stan coughed into his fist, breaking the short silence and replacing it with a new one.

"I think I'll just stay with Stan." Bip said. He grinned "I mean, I can't take a nap while monster hunting, right?"

Dipper rolled his eyes and gave a short farewell and then clambered onto the boat with Soos. Mabel, on the other hand, narrowed her eyes and studied her brother's face. Bip kept up the façade, masking his nervousness with a curt laugh.

"What, I told you I woke up early." He shrugged "I'm tired."

Mabel was clearly not convince. "Allright…." She muttered, still eyeing him as Dipper helped her onto the boat. Over the edge she pointed and growled "But we need to talk about your sleeping habits, young man!"

"Buuuttt moooooommmmm…." Bip whined. The sarcastic response was automatic. Dipper snorted back a laugh and covered his mouth with his hands, trying not to break down in hysterical tears. Mabel didn't find it amusing. Bip waved his siblings off as they went on their merry little way, but could still feel his sister's glare burning into his soul, even when he knew there was no way she could see him anymore.

Bip didn't have to fake the yawn that came out of his mouth as he dropped himself into his uncle's shammy little boat. Stan looked at the boy with a slight raise of an eyebrow.

"So you sure you won't regret this choice?" he asked cynically. Bip offered a response in the form of a shrug.

"Man, I just wanna SLEEP." He murmured drowsily. The water moving the boat was already causing his head to spin. He flopped his body over the side of the boat need her puke if need be. He could feel Stan's gaze on his back. Then there was a quiet _whirr_ of the boat's motor and they were skidding across the water's surface. The rustic blades spun so sharply against the ridge of their little ship and each _scree_ was a new onslaught of pain.

It didn't take long for Bip's purpose of flopping over the boat took place. The boat slowed suddenly to a halt.

"Ya' okay, Kid…?" he asked. The man's voice slivered like a snake against his eyes…. Wait, you can't hear with your eyes. Can you? His head spun and he offered no response as he vomited into the water. "Bip?"

He limply waved him off. With a slow lift of his head and a wipe of his sleeve across his mouth, he grinned "Car sick."

"We're in a boat." Stan said, unimpressed.

Bip let out a huff of indignation "Then BOAT sick, then!"

Stan rolled his eyes and started to mess with his fishing rod. He muttered something under his breath and his eyes darted back to the kid, whom had re-claimed their place over the side of the boat. Awkwardly, the old man shifted into his vest and pulled out his joke book. Still in the blind spot of his young companion, he flipped through the pages, his eyes scanning the words on the pages. He grinned.

"Hey kid, why did the skeleton want a friend?" he asked, his voice light but still gruff. Bip groaned in response.

"Because he was DEAD INSIDE." the boy snapped. His harsh comment was not taken as such.

"Nwah kid, because he was feeling BONELY!" Stan laughed at his own joke. Well someone had to. Bip groaned at the horrible-ness of the pun and almost fell into the water. Stan lunged to pull him back onto the boat. "Geesh, I guess you don't like puns that much, eh?" he said as he put the boy back onto his seat. The old man settled back into his own place, frowning in disappointment as Bip flopped right back over the side again.

With a pout he scanned over the lake's surface and spotted another pair of people not too far away. A new set grin on his face, he revved up the boat's motor and made his way over to them, a bit slower this time around.

"Hey, wanna hear a joke?" he asked as they approached. The couple look at him, rather annoyed. Stan took this as a 'yes' and continued "My Ex Wife still misses me…."

Bip looked over his shoulder to Stan, blinking ever so sleepily.

"BUT HER AIM IS GETTING BETTER!" Stan grinned, swinging his arms back and forth. Bip let out a loud groan of protest and proceeded to lightly hit Stan in the arm repeatedly. The old man easily held him back "Get it kid? HER AIM IS GETTING BETTER!"

"MY AIM IS GETTING BETTER TOO, OLD MAN!" Bip snarled, yelling in fury as he repeatedly (and weakly) slapped his uncle. Stan laughed in response.

"Get it!? It's because marriage is terrible!" he grinned at the couple. They responded with a snobby huff and went about their MARRY little way (get it? It's because the guy was gonna propose and marry and merry are homophones…oh nevermind.)

"OH MY GOD, STAN!" Bip backed up, blinking up dramatic tears "Way to crush my young dreams."

Stan rolled his eyes "Uh… Didn't take ya as a romantic, kid."

"Well, I am!" Bip huffed. He dramatically turned and crossed his arms across his chest, pouting dramatically. With a rather forced air of determination he clutched at his heart "One day, I shall find my Juliet! Except without all the murder and DEATH."'

"Uh…Good luck." Stan said, rolling his eyes. The two exchanged glares with eachother before Bip coldly turned his back to him and leaned back over the edge of the boat. A frown no one saw flashed over Stan's face and he turned his attention back to his fishing pole.

Bip stared at his wavering reflection in the water for what seemed like an hour, listening to the sound of Stan shuffling about the boat. He didn't….dislike, Stan. But the man was certainly not one of his favorite people to be around. The boy's thoughts trailed off. Who DID he like…? Dipper and Mabel, certainly. Soos was decent, he didn't care much for Windy or whatever her name was. From what he knew of McGucket….

 _Drofelddif._

Bip shook his head to clear it. That intrusive voice was spewing nonsense again. The nonsense was relatively new yet the only reason it bugged him was because…

 _Open the Portal_

It reminded him of the ever-present nagging in the back of his mind and brought it to his immediate attention. He muttered, trying to focus on something else. Anything else.

Suddenly a hand larger than his head grabbed him by his collar and dropped him again in the center of the boat. Stan crouched too, covering his ears with a devious grin.

"Wh-" Bip started to ask, his question was interrupted by a loud, yet muffled, explosion. Water spewed up from under the boat in the form of a nuclear cloud. "Stan, WHAT THE HELL!?" He screeched as the boat rocked over the forced waves. A fish fell from the sky and landed with a _SMACK_ on the boy's head.

"Hey it actually worked." Stan grinned, grabbing a hold of the fish's tail. Bip grinded his teeth, his eyes narrowing.

"SERIOUSLY!? YOU COULD'VE KILLED US!" he snapped.

"But I didn't!" Stan seemed proud of himself as he lightly tapped Bip on the nose with the fish. The look of annoyance seen so often seen with the boy made itself present. Stan shrugged the look off and threw the single fish into the bucket. He leaned back into his seat and started to wring out his now-soaked hat. Bip's scowl grew in intensity and his mouth opened to say something when the red and blue lights and the sound of sirens cut him off. Both he and Stan looked to the direction the sounds were coming from with similar frowns. "Uh oh." Stan said bluntly, as if this was a mild inconvenience. He turned and started to mess with the motor.

"NOW what are you doing!?" Bip snapped, his eyes darting to the direction of the approaching Boat Patrol.

"Losin' the cops, kid." The motor revved up. He grinned "Hold on!"

Bip clung onto the sides of the boat the same moment the motor delivered a kick that no one could have expect and the boat raced across the water. The police boat was behind them quite a ways as water sprayed up from their own. The sudden rush of motion sent Bip's vertigo over the edge and his head felt as if it were split open.

But it was easy to ignore.

He grinned like he hadn't in a long time and laughed out loud. Stan's own expression brightened as his young companion seemed genuinely happy for once. He laughed too.

However much fun the two might have had didn't stop the cops from catching them. Stan reluctantly wore the anklet that he was assigned and crossed his arm, pouting. Bip grinned smugly at him. Considering he 'was twelve and probably had no idea what he was doing', he got off scott-free. Stan forced a grin and smacked Bip on the back.

"Well at least one of us got out of that without any consequences!" he said.

"You WERE the one who threw a bomb in the lake." Bip muttered. He batted his lashes and pouted mockingly "I was just a small child who got caught up in the mess."

"SURE you are kid." Stan rolled his eyes.

"I WAS!" Bip pouted sincerely "I was taking a little nap and you tried to blow the water up."

"Buuuttttt…." Stan grinned, wriggling an eyebrow. Bip blinked in confusion.

"But….what….?" he asked. Stan leaned in closer, still grinning. Bip fidgeted "I… I don't know what's going on here." A fish smacked him in the face.

"BUT WE CAUGHT A FISH!" Stan declared. "HIGH FIVE, KID!"

Bip pouted. "I only have four fingers."

Stan rolled his eyes "Then high four." Recollection flashed in his eyes for a second. Or maybe Bip imagined it? He forced a smile, it came out a bit awkwardly, he could tell. Unsure for a moment, as if he thought doing so formed some sort of pact he didn't want, he slapped his palm against Stan's.

 _Yelnats._

The two continued to chatter about things and they found they actually had quite a bit in common. Bip, kind of bashfully, talked of how he had trouble sleeping and often ended up wandering around the house in the dead of night.

"That's called insomnia, kid. It happens to the best of us." Stan said, sipping a soda. He held up the can and shook it "Either that or you have too much caffeine."

Bip replied by sticking his tongue out. Stan rolled his eyes and reached over, ruffling the boy's hair. The said child flailed his arms about in protest, screaming nonsense about floating islands or something. It was just for an act at first but then-

 _"LATROP EHT NEPO!"_ He slapped his hands over his mouth as the words spewed out of his mouth. Confused, his uncle simply started at him, not saying or doing anything. Just…stared. Bip's thoughts raced. Was it too late to cover that up? Did Stan think he was crazy? Why did he just say that out loud? That never happened before.

The boy's heart started pounding against his chest, his body started shaking and his vision became a blur. Why was he losing control of everything? Everything was slipping, he's losing it, he's losing it… It was too late to cover it up. Stan's face flashed with concern. Bip swallowed nervously. He knew he was screwed. Stan will tell Dipper and Mabel and then the two will be worried and tell their parents and then Bip would have to go home or-

He gasped and clutched at his head, trembling. Or maybe all three of them would have to go home. And Dipper and Mabel would be upset and it would be all because of him… He couldn't handle that. He couldn't handle the only two people he liked being mad at him because he screwed up their summer. Tears stung at his eyes. He'll have to go see the therapist again- he'll have to sit through all the talks and pretend to be better but this time it won't work because they'd know he's faking and Dipper would feeling bad for not knowing and Mabel would feel bad for suspecting but not doing anything and he will end up in an asylum or something and they'd blame Stan for it and and and and andandand-

"Bip." Stan said quietly, curtly. "It's alright. You'll be alright."

Bip's breathing was frantic. What was Stan saying!? It wouldn't be alright! Everything was-

"Kid, listen to me. It's in your head." Stan's voice fell against the roaring of blood in his ears. He couldn't think- He couldn't breath- "It's alright. Bip…." His voice trailed off. A brief moment passed. When the man spoke again his voice was oddly light "Hey kid, you're name isn't actually 'Bip', is it?"

"No." the word was quick, short, quiet. Stan's hand was on his shoulder.

"So what's your actual name…?" Stan said, trying to be gruff with his voice. Forcing a tone of indifference. Bip scratched for the answer, focusing on the question. Trying not to focus on the future for once. Trying not to plan.

"W-W…." he took in a breath "William. Pines."

Stan nodded slowly. "So how'd you end up being called 'Bip'? Wouldn't Will or Bill or something like that be your nickname?"

Bip cleared his throat and tried not to stammer. "They called me Bill for a while- Mom, Dad, Dipper…. M-M-" he took another breath "Mabel liked to call me Billy." He trailed off. Stan didn't say anything but sat, listening. Waiting.

 _Staring._

"When the kids at school started calling Dipper, well…. Er, Dipper, he felt really embarrassed." Bip focused on his story. Not forcefully. But he told the tale so many time his mind went blank when he told it now. "He was really embarrassed, so I suggested everyone should start calling me 'Bipper' or something." A small smile came to his face "Mabel didn't like it, she thought it sounded dumb." A small laugh "They were both fine with 'Bip' though…."

"And it just stuck, eh, kid?" Stan said. Bip studied his face. It was as stoic as usual, mocking even. But at the same time tired-

"Dammit." Bip growled through his teeth. He looked up to his uncle "Sorry Stan- Uh,…." He fidgeted "Thanks."

"Thanks for what!?" Stan snapped "Your foul mouth? I'm gonna have to wash your mouth out with soup when we get back!" Bip blinked. It dawned on him this was Stan's return to normalcy. He forced a grin and stuck his tongue out.

"What the _fuck_ are you gonna do?" He put as much emphasis on the swear as he could. He was suddenly in a head lock being lightly-noogied.

"I can GROUND ya', kid!" Stan said in response. Bip flailed about again in an attempt to be released from the noogieing.

Eventually, Dipper, Mabel, and Soos came back from their monster hunt in a ruined boat. Dipper and Mabel seemed to have been through some sort of lesson as they apologize then them (and Soos) joined up on the boat and they proceeded to get into several more hijinks before the day was over. The two of the triplets had quite a bit of a story to tell their brother when they sat in their room that night. Apparently the Gobblewonker was just a robot built by McGucket to get some attention from his son. Bip nodded patiently through his sibling's excited story-telling, making comments when he believed necessary.

"So I guess you were right to stay behind, Bip." Dipper sighed.

"Oh how was I supposed to know the gobblewonker was a robot? I wasn't _right_ , I was just _lazy."_ Bip said in response. Dipper chuckled a bit and rolled his eyes. Mabel tilted her head, studying Bip intently.

"Well, YOU seem better." She nodded, satisfied.

Dipper boltened up, his eyes wide. "Wait, was something wrong with Bip?"

Bip chuckled awkwardly "I was a bit sick, but I'm feeling better."

"Oh wow… Sorry Bip, I had no idea…" Dipper sighed, rubbing his arm. Bip rolled his eyes.

"Yeah. That's kind of the point." He muttered.

Mabel grinned and sprang lightly across the room, practically tackling Dipper against the wall. "I knew!"

A sarcastic applaud met her declaration. Dipper and Mabel looked up at their brother and proceeded to glare suspiciously.

"Wait, so what did you do with Stan all day?" Dipper asked. Bip chuckled.

"Well he blew up the lake, we tried to out run the cops, failed, Stan got in trouble…" he rolled onto his stomach and grinned "But we caught a fish."

* * *

 **Oh my goooddddd this took forevveeeeerrrrr…**

 **But I'm kinda proud of it? I'm hoping you guys like reading Bip as much as I like writing him. Next episode (chapter) is HeadHunters and I don't think that one is going to be that long. So… Yeah, it shouldn't take as long to post that one unless I get really lazy.**

 **Post-Credit (A/N) Scene**

Wendy sat at her register, her feet propped up on the counter and her nose in her magazine. Behind the counter, much to her ignorance bounced Mabel. Up. Down. Up. Down.

Wendy's eyes went over to where the girl was bouncing. Entranced by the younger girl's oddity she put both her feet and magazine and watched Mabel bounce.

Bip slid over behind Wendy, trying to stifle a giggle. He took a deep breath, swept out his arms, and leaned against the counter.

"Hey, what's hop-pening?" he said casually.

Weny's face turned one to pure annoyance and she groaned, hiding her face in the magazine. Bip and Mabel giggled madly as they ran off.

 _ **AFA VRX PBB QEB RKABOQXIB OBCBOBKZB?**_


	3. Chapter 3

**Headhunters**

"I have a keen sense of observation." Dipper said, smugly. Bip, on the recliner, and Mabel on the ground each tilted their heads in a similar manner. "For example!" said Dipper, feeling the need to elaborate "from just smelling your breath I can tell you've been eating… an entire tube of toothpaste?"

Mabel muttered under her breath, no doubt claiming it was sparkly and that was her reason for eating it. Bip laughed.

"Yeah, 'keen sense of observation', alright." He chuckled with a cheeky grin "ANYONE could've told you that."

"Yeah, well, you do better!" Dipper growled, his cheeks flushing red. Bip's grin widened at the challenge.

"Alright." His eyes scanned the living room, he closed his eyes. "Someone is in the hallway over there. From the sounds of it… Soos. Yeah, Soos. Definitely his footsteps." He paused. Mabel looked awed by her brother's amazing sense of hearing while Dipper rolled his eyes, not convinced and fairly certain the boy was just making things up. "He's coming this way now. Dunno why." He opened his eyes and met his siblings' expressions with a comedic pout. "What?"

"There's no WAY you could tell that!" Dipper declared. He crossed his arms, satisfied. Mabel laughed a bit sheepishly.

"Yeah Bippity, it DOES sound a bit far-fetched." She snorted. Bip rolled his eyes and held up three fingers. The other two siblings watched in slight confusion as he put each finger down in intervals. When he put the last finger down, Soos appeared in the doorway.

"Yo dudes I just found some weird mystery door!"

Mabel and Dipper, baffled, turned to their sibling who smirked smugly.

"Told ya."

(Insert Theme Song Here)

Bip sat on the floor, watching his sister pace around her workspace. Apparently behind the mystery door was a good amount of wax figurines, each sculpted with a surprise amount of realism. But upon the realization of the death of Wax Abraham Lincoln, their Grunkle Stan was flabbergasted. Mabel, being the artsy, overly-eager girl she is, took upon the challenge of creating a new sculpture to replace the one that had melted.

"Hey Bip, what do you think? Fairy Princess or Horse Princess?" the sister grinned, holding up her sketches for her brother to critique. Bip studied them for a moment, stroking at a non-existent beard.

"Both." He said with an approving nod. Mabel's face lit up and her grin grew over her face.

"Brilliant!"

"Whatever is brilliant, no." Dipper interrupted, pushing down the sketchbook between them. "How about something more…realistic? Like from your family." He smiled as he said this, putting his hands on his hips. Bip rolled his eyes.

And it seemed as Dipper suggested this, Stan happened to waltz in, asking the whereabouts of his pants or something when he posed dramatically. A smile slammed onto Mabel's face and she thanked a muse that was not present. The family members in the room proceeded to be confused.

It took Mabel a surprisingly short time to make a rather creepy wax figure in likeness to their great uncle. After an understandable short freak-out Stan seemed to have gotten rather chummy with the wax figurine, declaring it as the 'Seventh Wonder of the World' and re-opening the wax figurine portion of the Mystery Shack.

Wax Stan's fame was short-lived, being decapitated shortly after. Stan took the beheading rather seriously, and Dipper and Mabel set themselves out to solve the mystery of the wax figurine's death.

"Hey Bip, we're gonna go inspect murderer suspects." Mabel said casually, with a grin. "Wanna come along?"

"Sounds kinda pointless." Bip rolled his eyes, kicking his feet on the wall of their room. Dipper and Mabel exchanged looks for a second. Dipper took a step forward.

"You still feeling sick?" he said, his expression saying it all. All the shame of not realizing his brother's crisis the day before and coming across as so callous. Bip thought it was a bit too much, but appreciated his brother's concern none the less. Mabel tilted her head behind him, her eyes subtly taking in all of Bip's body language and at the same time calculating it. Now Bip loved his sister, but hated it when she did that. Chances are she wasn't even aware she was doing it, but he absolutely loathed that look. That was the look that said 'you have no idea what I know about you just by looking at you'. And he hated it because HE could do it and therefore knew what kind of conclusion one can come to.

Maybe he just hated the people-people? The people who are… er, people-smart? Bip was so caught up in his pondering that he ended up missing the appropriate answer-frame.

"Bip?" Dipper blinked, his mouth folding into a concerned frown.

"Just thinking about how weird the word 'people' is." He muttered in response (completely sincere, by the way). He waved his hands out in front of him as he explained " 'People' is plural, right? So why do we say 'peoples'?"

Mabel's eyes widened as if she was just confronted with the greatest question known to humanity. Dipper rolled his eyes and muttered: 'he's fine' under his breath.

"We'll see ya later then, Bip." Dipper muttered.

"And we shall come back to you with the answer to your people-question!" Mabel grinned, pointing finger guns at her brother. Dipper lightly jabbed her side with his elbow. "Oh yeah, also with who murdered Wax Stan!"

"See ya siblings." Bip waved them off, going back to his pondering. The two made their way off and Bip continued to think about the word 'people'.

Eventually, as expected, the topic got rather boring and his mind started to go numb thinking about it. Blankly he stared at the ceiling of the shared bedroom and then-

 _Open the Portal._

Bip swung his feet, using the momentum to get himself up and made his way down the stairs. Stan was probably doing something interesting…

Huh.

Bip frowned as the thought occurred to him. He kind of _wanted_ to talk to Stan. A grin crossed his face. Liking people was kind of fun.

It actually took him a few minutes of searching before he found his grunkle…setting up a funeral…? The boy stood in the doorway, confused as Stan dragged pieces of furniture about, looking oddly somber. He cleared his throat to catch the man's attention, which worked swimmingly.

"Hey kid, what's up?" Stan said, leaning on the chair he was dragging about.

Bip walked into the room and motioned around "What's this for?"

"Oh." Stan rolled his eyes and waved dismissively "Just holding a funeral for Wax Stan, is all." Bip laughed a bit, not putting any effort in to hide it. Stan suddenly looked annoyed "What?"

"Well I knew you were a bit vain but this is a tad too much, don'tcha think?" he chuckled. Stan looked hurt for half a second but quickly covered it up.

"Yeah, kid. I'm _this_ vain." The old man didn't mean to put in the scorning tone. Bip blinked, blushing slightly and kind of flustered.

"What? What did I say?" Bip asked, his voice dropping. He was good at picking things like that up. Stan hadn't seemed to realize it until just that moment, though.

"Nothing." Stan said, rolling his eyes and continuing his task. "Hey, maybe you should go catch up with your brother and sister, eh? They're out doing stuff."

Bip frowned, upset. What did he say…? He found himself hurt. He was NEVER hurt. Well, maybe once when Mabel got mad at him, a few times with Dipper but… Stan offered nothing else, so Bip didn't say anything. He muttered an 'okay', shoved his hands into his windbreaker's pockets, and walked out the door into the early-evening.

His footsteps down the road were more shuffling as he stared at his slippers and kicked whatever stones or pebbles that came across his path. The boy liked this particular pair of slippers. They were neon green with dark purple sequins, and of course, as per usual of Mabel's handiworks, covered in glitter.

Bip felt his heart drop. Maybe that was why Mabel was so upset about Wax Stan? She worked really hard to make the weird thing and then someone went out of their way to wreck it. His mouth felt dry.

Wow, he suddenly knew how Dipper felt earlier.

The more Bip thought, the more he realized Mabel often grinned off her problems. All three of them had an issue with that, it seems. Dipper worries too much, Mabel ignores it, and he just hides it….

He found himself wondering if Stan was hiding anything.

A rock came across his path and the boy swung his leg back to punt it, but stopped, realizing it was moving. Slowly, he knelt down onto the ground, and then laid on his stomach. Under the rock-which-wasn't-a-rock, there was a small tortoise meandering across the path.

Bip picked it up, sitting on the dirt and observing the tiny reptile. It blinked at him with beady, yet adorable, eyes. The boy found a grin and lightly petted the turtles head with one finger. The creature seemed skittish at first, but then rubbed its green head against the boy.

He stared at it for a moment, pondering. "I'm going to call you Mr. Turtle." He nodded satisfied. It was a tortoise, he knew that, but 'Mr. Tortoise' didn't sound as adorable as 'Mr. Turtle'. Bip proceeded to be intrigued by his small new friend as he gently carried it, momentarily forgetting about his siblings and his imagined dispute with Stan. He was a grown-up, maybe being so oddly vain was just part of that.

 _?Drofnats tuoba woh_

The boy ignored the nonsense and chose to pay attention to the not-turtle instead.

* * *

Bip sat at the edge of a small pond he found in the woods, leaning back on his arms and enjoying the slight breeze and the rustling of pine needles.

Mr. Turtle was in his coat pocket, munching lazily on a baby tomato Bip had bought at the local market. Afterwards, he had looked for his siblings, who he couldn't find anywhere. He called Mabel and she had picked up, but said (rather quickly):

"SORRYBIP,DIPPERANDIFOUNDOUTWHOKILLEDWAXSTANSOI'LLCALLYOUBACKMAYBEBYE!" then she hung up.

Bip rolled his eyes, satisfied that his siblings were okay. It was probably around 11 at night when Mabel made good on her kind-of promise and called him back, waking him up from a rather unexpected nap. Now to be perfectly honest, the first thing he did was look for his tortoise, which was now sleeping in his coat. He sighed in relief and carefully took his phone out of his pocket and answered.

"Hey Bip, where are you?" she said, worried.

"Oh. I found a turtle." He said, pressing the phone between his shoulder and ear.

"Oh cool a turtle." Mabel sounded slightly relieved. There was the sound of the phone shuffling and suddenly Dipper's voice said, rather quickly and cracking every other syllable:

"Man, where are you? You have us worried sick!"

"I'm okay, I'm okay!" Bip said quickly, trying to calm down his near-hysterical brother. "I found a turtle and I fed it by a pond, I must've of fallen asleep is all!"

A low groan served as the response "Do you need one of us to get you? It's probably dark out right now." His brother said, sounding both annoyed and concerned.

Bip looked about, finding he could see perfectly well. The stars were shining brightly above but that just made him wonder how far away he was from town… Then again, he still had a cellphone signal so he couldn't have been that far.

"Nah, I got it. Sorry for worrying ya." He said. "Yeah. Alright. I'll be careful. Bye." Bip closed his phone and slowly stood up, stretching his arms upward. This wasn't one of the most unusual places he had fallen asleep at, but granted he usually fell asleep inside. He stretched his legs out, finding them oddly stiff and then went about his way home.

His approximated distance was a tad off, and he forgot to factor in how dark it was and how easily distracted he is and how he really didn't know where he was. Luckily his insomnia played in his favor this time and he managed to not fall asleep on his feet on his way back. But by the time he did get home it was rather…early.

Probably around 6?

He hoped with all his heart his brother and sister were asleep or busy doing something else besides trying to find their idiot of a brother. Bip sighed and felt Mr. Turtle squirm in his pocket. He took the reptile out and stroked its head, and then offered it another baby tomato. The tortoise seemed pleased.

Unfortunately, he was right about his siblings being distracted.

The Mystery Shack came into his view right as Dipper ran down the side of the roof and stumbled onto the loft. What looked like the wax figurine of Sherlock Holmes was close behind- And judging from the sheen of pre-dawn against its glassy features- it WAS the wax figure. Bip's confusion was quickly devoured by fear as the wax man went after his brother with a sword.

His mind raced. The sun was coming up rather quickly, it was summer so it was probably hot enough to melt the Sherlock but-

Dipper's weapon flew out of his hands and he fell onto the roof, Sherlock standing over him.

Bip's eyes widened. He suddenly felt hot. Dipper was going to-

NO! _NONONONONO!_

 _ENIM S'EH_

Mr. Turtle squirmed wildly as if pained and wiggled its way out of Bip's numb hands and fell limply to the ground. The boy didn't notice, his vision wavering with all the possible results of this battle. Literally. Too many endings. Too many things he didn't want. He didn't want Dipper to die, he didn't want to become a monster, he didn't want to burn down the shack-

Suddenly time stopped to him. He knew what he wanted.

EB TXKQBA FQ QL YROK

Time started up again. The wax figure melted into a puddle. Dipper was safe. Bip lowered his still-glowing hand and felt the heat let up.

 _His brother was okay._

 _Latrop Eht Nepo._

 _Shut the frick up I'm having a moment._

* * *

 **So yeah I lied, this chapter was long and it did take me a while. I'm aiming to update this story at least twice a month because that seems to be my pattern for it so far.**

… **.Next chapter is The Hand that Rocks the Mabel.**

… **.**

 **Well I hope you like fire.**

 **Post A/N/Credit Scene:**

The triplets sat in their respective places in the living room: Bip on the recliner, Dipper and Mabel on the floor. Dipper and Mabel were covered with scrapes and drops of now-hardened wax, Bip covered in twigs, dirt and grass. Stan wandered into the room, confused.

"Hey what happened to you three?" he asked.

"I decapitated Larry King." Dipper offered.

"I melted Shakesphere." Mabel shrugged.

"I found a turtle." Bip said, holding up his new pet tortoise.


	4. Chapter 4

**The Hand that Rocks the Mabel**

Bip was on the floor of the triplets' room, his chin on his hands, his feet kicking lightly against the floorboards. His attention was focus on his snuggly pet tortoise which was working diligently away at a strawberry. Dipper and Mabel were downstairs watching TV with Soos, and really didn't question it when Bip said he'd prefer to watch .

The reptile was a lot more entertaining than half the stuff on their television anyway.

Vaguely, he noted the sound of someone coming up the stairs but chose to ignore it. Really he just liked Mr. Turtle. Mr. Turtle was a fine shelled friend.

The door creaked open. Bip ignored it. There was the sound of someone clearing their throat. Bip ignored it. Someone walked over and sat on Dipper's bed and watched him. Bip ignored it.

"…hey kid." Stan said. Bip ignored it. "...So you got a pet turtle."

"He's actually a tortoise." Bip snorted indignantly. Stan suppressed a sigh. Yep, the kid was mad at him. But how could he explain it to him? He fidgeted a moment. Perhaps it was a bit creepy he pretended that wax figurine was his brother-

Well when he put it into words it _did_ sound a bit nuts. Stan hated to have to admit it, but he didn't want Bip to hate him. The kid seemed to have a lot of issues and it'd probably do him some good to trust the person taking care of him for the summer. BUUUUTTT…. He had his stubborn pride and just apologizing seemed a bit far-fetched for him.

"I think I gotta spare tank if you want it." He offered after a moment.

Bip eyed him curiously. "Why would you have one of those?"

"Didn't you notice the axolotl downstairs?" Stan said, raising an eyebrow.

Bip stared at him a long moment and then shook his head "Man, I can't even _pronounce_ that."

Stan rolled his eye "The weird salamander thing with those frills on its cheeks."

"The mudskip?" Bip blinked.

"Mud…skip?" Stan seemed confused.

"You know, the Monstermon." The boy said. He held up Mr. Turtle. "Like this guy reminds me of Turtletwig."

Stan just stared at him like he grew an extra head. Then he shook his own head and huffed "Kid, I don't understand a single thing you're saying. Do you want the tank or not?"

Bip snorted "Sure." He continued to stare intently on his pet as if pondering something. Stan rocked a little, thrumming his fingers along his knees. Slowly and awkwardly, he got up and went over to the door.

"Well… I'll go get the tank then."

Bip eyed him "Wait, is this just your way of apologizing?" he asked. Stan snorted indignantly. The kid was a bit _too_ perceptive for him to feel comfortable with. Mabel had that too, but she didn't realize it. Dipper was observant, but of situations, not people. Bip had the ability to see through people and he _knew_ it. And that was more unsettling then most anything else he's seen in this crazy town.

"Do you want the tank or not?" Stan repeated his previous question, the annoyance in his tone coming easily this time.

To his surprise, Bip laughed "Yes please, Stanio-Mio!"

Stan decided not to question the kid's nickname for him.

(Insert Theme Song Here)

Dipper rolled his eyes and kept his attention on his book. His brother had been on edge since the three of them (plus Soos) had gone to the Tent of Telepathy. Bip quickly judging people was nothing new. Bip quickly hating people was nothing new.

So really, nothing was new.

Mabel kicked her feet, chattering on about how much fun she was going to have with her new pal Gideon that afternoon. Bip paced, chewing on his lip and just looking annoyed. Mabel paused in her rambling and narrowed her eyes, watching their brother pace about. Dipper found himself watching too.

"Wow, did you two switch bodies?" The sister asked all of a sudden. Dipper and Bip turned to give her their similar looks of annoyance/confusion. "Well, I'm just saying!" she clarified "Bip's pacing about and Dipper looks like he doesn't care!"

"I doubt switching bodies is a thing." Dipper rolled his eyes again. He blinked and then frowned  
"Wait, maybe it is?" Just like that, Journal Number 3 was out and opened on his lap, the boy clicking his pen in anticipation as he flipped through the pages.

Bip rolled his eyes "Yep. You're right. It is I, the Dippers." As he said this he made a face like something a little kid would make and he waddled about, making strange noises that could be compared to a raccoon.

Mabel giggled then straightened up, composed herself…

…and joined in.

The two 'The Dippers' leaned on either side of the actual Dipper and continued to make weird raccoon noises. Dipper looked at each of them in turn, his face turning a vibrant red as a rather comical expression of rage was slapped on his face. Bip and Mabel decided they couldn't keep it up anymore and both fell on the floor laughing while Dipper fumed.

A soft knock on the door went unheard by Dipper and Mabel. Bip, wiping a tear from his eye, got up and went to answer it, leaving his two siblings behind. Upon opening the door, he looked one way, then another. Then a groan escaped him and he looked down.

"Oh hello, Bippity!" Lil Gideon beamed up at him, his little eyes making Bip want to stab something.

Could he set him on fire? Probably. Probably best not to do it here though. Too much wood. The house might catch on fire.

Bip leaned against the doorframe and studied him for half a second. Then, with carefully calculated mockingness he asked "What are you supposed to be? Some sort of living ventriloquist dummy?"

Gideon's face scrunched up for half a second and he opened his mouth to say something when he suddenly went back to his pleasant expression. Mabel was in the doorway standing next to Bip with a big grin on her face.

"Oh hey Gideon!" Mabel chirped, bouncing out of the house. She turned and waved "Bye Dip-Dop! Bye Bippity-Boo!"

"See ya later Mabel." Dipper waved from his seat.

Bip darted a rather threatening glare at Gideon and then put on his widest grin and most dramatic bow. "See ya when I'm able, Mabel!"

"See ya in a bit, Bip." Mabel responded, shooting finger guns toward Bip. Her and Gideon made their way down the dirt path and Bip waved after them until they were out of his sight.

A few days later, Bip, Dipper, Wendy and Soos were all in the gift shop after hours, talking and just hanging out. Bip was in a corner, amusing himself by feeding his pet tortoise a tomato. Wendy and Dipper chattered on about any topic that came to mind while Soos was working to fix up a radiator. Mabel was out and about with Gideon.

Eventually Stan lumbered out, scratching his back and drinking out of a mug. He cast a quick look at Bip that looked like something between a smirk and smile, which was promptly returned with a large toothy grin. Dipper blinked, confused. When did Bip and Stan start to get along? He found himself a bit jealous. Bip was difficult to get close to. He had a history of hiding things, the boy even went to therapy for a while. He never told Dipper or Mabel why or what for, but he'd gotten through it. Dipper sighed. Bip is unpredictable. No way of knowing who he'll love or hate and why.

Dipper's thought process was derailed by Stan spewing out his coffee.

"That little schiester is dating my great niece!?" Stan snapped, glaring daggers into the paper.

"Yeah, it's all over the place." Wendy said, holding up her phone to show the web articles. Dipper seemed unfazed by this too, knowing his sister was simply trying to be kind to Gideon.

Stan growled and declared was going to put a stop to this. He then magically/quickly changed into his 'Mr. Mystery' outfit and strutted out the door. Bip sat on a barrel and grinned, hoping with all his little heart that Gideon would get what was coming to him. He cackled softly and stroked Mr. Turtle.

"That is hilarious." Wendy said, pointing to him.

"You look just a like a supervillain, Dude." Soos commented. Bip opened his mouth to respond with something not too nice but spotted Dipper a little aways, looking like he was enjoying the comparison with a small smile. So instead of saying his rather rude insult, Bip simply made his grin wider and his expression cookier.

"Mwahahahaha…." He said, purposely stroking Mr. Turtle more like a cat. The poor tortoise seemed so confused.

Stan didn't hold true to his promise. Rather he struck up a business deal of sorts, apparently arranging some sort of marriage. Or he said he was, anyway. The old man knew that that kind of thing was sort of idiotic. He couldn't force Mabel to marry someone. First off: Even if she liked him now, that could change. Mabel was _twelve_ , she really shouldn't be dating anyone.

 _Buuuttttt_ , no point letting this opportunity go to waste. Stan chuckled. He'll get his not-so-fair share and then bail out. He sipped some sparkling water with a cheeky grin.

Meanwhile, back at the shack, Mabel paced about in circles, chewing her fingernails and fidgeting with her hair.

"I can't get out of this!" Mabel muttered frantically, her voice randomly dropping and rising with despair. Bip felt the heat rise up, felt his chest clench. Ooooohhhh, something was going to burn. Some _one_ was going to turn into A PILE OF ASH.

What kind of creep pressures a girl into situations like this? What kind of cold-hearted jackass makes a person feel inclined to _date them?_

It made him sick.

Several things.

One of them being he genuinely wanted to hurt someone.

 _But no point pondering that!_

His expression didn't show all the rage he was feeling. If anything, it looked a lot like his usual annoyance with a pinch more anger added to it.

"Hey, how about I just break up with Gideon for you?" Dipper suggested. Mabel squeaked a bit in delight and threw her arms around his shoulders, saying thank you repeatedly. "Okay, okay. Enough of that." Dipper chuckled, gently pushing his sister away. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Bip was not satisfied with this.

"What's up, Bippity?" Mabel frowned. She came to her own conclusion and beamed a grin "Oh don't worry! You heard Dipper, he'll break up with Gideon for me!"

Bip suddenly grinned. A bit too suddenly.

"Yep! I guess you're right." He laughed it off but then came to an abrupt stop, sticking out his bottom lip in a way that was common to him. "Though I still don't like him."

"Oh you don't like anyone." Mabel waved him off. She seemed off, not entirely convinced.

Dipper frowned. He didn't like how bad he was at reading Bip. Mabel he could just tell… But Bip….

Bip irritated him. But he loved him anyway. That's just how brothers are, right?

* * *

The next thing he knew he was plummeting out a window.

Dipper had done what he promised he would and told Gideon how Mabel felt. Soon after (now looking back, a bit suspiciously soon after) he had an offer for an interview.

And he stupidly thought nothing was up.

Well this was just what he gets for that. Plummeting down a cliff at high speeds with Gideon trying to beat him bloody after almost getting cut in half with lamb shears.

Well what else did he expect?

Not the streak of blue that rocketed towards them like a comet.

It collided them like a tidal wave, crashing and absorbing both of them in its blue flames. The light made Dipper's eyes go unfocused and the noise caused his ears to ring. He felt as if he was moved a lot faster all of a sudden. Suddenly felt the ground underneath him.

Dipper let out a loud yelp of pain and the light left him, leaving him with the breath knocked out of him and staring at the stars through the trees. His ears still rung. The egdes of his vision were a black haze.

N

OtH

InG

StA

YeD

In

fOc

Us

The entire world shook as if It were on a tilt-o-whirl. The stars swirled in circles. Everything had a bluish, ghostly glow. The wind sound distorted. Like fire-

Fire.

The clearing he landed in was on fire. Blue flames.

Dipper struggled to catch his breath, forcing himself to roll onto his stomach and then forcing his arms to support his weight. The world kept rocking. There was nothing to do about that.

Through his shaking vision he managed to spot Bip, his brother. Fire surrounded him like a torch, the flames licking at the air hungrily. One hand was clenched painfully to his chest. Dipper forced his head to look up a bit higher.

His heart stopped.

Something that mixed between a snarl and grin ripped like a tremor across Bip's face. His canine teeth looked more like fangs, his stance much like someone stumbling up from a bad fall. He seemed unfazed by the fire. But through all the blue and the blur Dipper could make out one other color.

Yellow.

It glowed from Bip's eyes, his pupils dilating into slits and his grin grew wider. When Dipper's gaze shakily dropped he spotted Gideon, cowering. His small form pressed against a trunk of a tree, tears and sweat running down his face.

Bip took a stumbling step foreward. The flames climbed higher, grew louder. Gideon wailed and pressed himself closer to the pine tree behind him. Like a tree could save him. A wild cackle ripped from Bip's throat and Dipper felt his stomach drop at the terrifying realization.

Bip was going to kill someone.

His world still shaking and in a haze, his body shrieking in both pain and nausea, his head spinning with everything he knew and everything he didn't knew, his heart screaming out in fear and the will to act, Dipper ran forward.

He couldn't let Bip do this.

Dipper knew he wasn't strong. He knew he wasn't able to stop anything with brute strength alone. He knew he'd get _BURNED_ , but what else could he do!?

He thought this to himself as his eyes watered up and he slammed his full weight into Bip. Dipper's mind went spinning and his entire body started to howl in pain, neurons firing rapidly. _Something's wrong! Something's Wrong! Stop it! Stop it! Leave him! Let him! It hurts!_

He pinned his brother to the ground and bit back the vomit and blood that tried to force its way out of his mouth. Horrified, Dipper watched Bip's hand reach out from under him and clawed at the ground for a moment like some sort of trapped animal. He stopped and simply held out his hand, almost invitingly.

The ringing in his ears finally subsided.

" _I'll kill you, you Lil' Thing."_ Bip cooed, beckoning to Gideon with one finger. Dipper's presence seemed to leave no impact on him. Gideon couldn't even form words to respond, his sobs and screams breaking apart any coherent thought. This seemed to amuse Bip as he cackled wildly. _"Cooommmmeeee heeeerrrrreeeee Lil' Pennttaaagrraaaaammmm~"_ It almost sounded like a purr.

"BIP, SNAP OUT OF IT!" Dipper screamed, feeling his tears evaporate off his face as they formed, being licked up by his brother's flames.

Strangely this entire event took maybe two minutes.

Mabel descended on the scene using the magic of Gideon's amulet. Quickly she got between her brothers and Gideon, her expression unreadable.

"Bip-" she tried to reach him.

Bip's eyes kept themselves trained on Gideon.

 _"It won't hurt that badly, I prommiiiisssseee~!"_ Bip sung. Dipper looked up at Mabel, silently begging her to do something.

She sighed and the light blue of the amulet shone bright for half a moment.

Then Bip went still beneath him.

* * *

It was quiet.


	5. Chapter 5

_**FQ TXP NRFBQ.**_

Gideon, Dipper and Mabel stared at Bip for a moment. Silence lingered over the clearing like a fog. The boy's fire let up, and with it, the pain. For what felt like a long time they sat there, tense. Waiting. For a while nothing made a sound, aside from the wind. A few moments longer and crickets started up their song again. An owl flew overhead.

The three children just stared at each other.

"Y-you Pines are demons!" Gideon cried, breaking the silence and sprung to his widdle feet and ran away into the words, screaming.

They let him go.

No point in caring about it right now. Dipper let out a breath he didn't know he was holding and got off of Bip and sat on the ground next to him. Moving slowly just in case he awoke some new pain, he checked himself over.

It must've been some sort of miracle. No scars, no bruises, no cuts, not even burns. He was perfectly fine. In fact, he felt…healthier, than he did before. Fully awake. No feeling of fatigue. No nausea, nothing.

A sniffle caught his attention. Dipper looked to his sister and dropped his hands. Mabel was on her feet still, shaking. Her lips quivered as she tried to simply talk.

"D-dipper- What….What just happened….?" Tears stung her eyes. She was trying so hard not to cry.

Dipper frowned and shook his head, unable to give her an answer. "I don't know."

Mabel dropped to her knees and put her head in her hands, her shoulders shaking. Hesitantly, Dipper went over to her and pulled her into a hug, patting her back in an attempt to comfort her. The adrenalin started to let up and he felt his own body begin to shake.

That was TERRIFYING.

He stared at Bip over Mabel's shoulder and hair, trying to make sense of it. What just happened? His brother was currently lying on the ground, no sign of the incident showing aside from a scratchmark here and there.

"Mabel-" his voice cracked. He took a breath and tried again "Mabel, did you see him jump after us?"

His sister pushed him away and wiped at her eyes, sniveling. She took a breath and then explained "Gideon pushed you out the window. When he did, I grabbed the amulet" she held out her hand, showing it "and went to get you. But before I could….Bip….just, ran in." she dropped her hands and shook her head, and wiped at her eyes. "S-sorry…"

Dipper didn't make her continue. He sat and waited.

Mabel took another breath. "He-er…ran in." she said, recollecting her train of thought "And saw you fell. He got r-really angry and then….went after you." She sniffled. She shook her head "That's all I saw until I got here." She blinked the tears from her eyes and her gaze slipped to Bip. After half a second she crawled her way over to him and then gently rolled him onto his back.

Dipper studied him intently. After a moment, he got to his feet and offered Mabel a hand to help her up. She took it and then they both stood over him.

"Well…" Dipper frowned. "What now?"

Mabel shot a forced grin "Well we just have to carry him back! Duh!" She knelt down again and draped one of Bip's arms over her shoulder and hauled him up, his feet dragging on the floor. "Come on, Dipper, get his other arm."

"Huh? No I mean about that fire thing!" Dipper said, his sister's train of thought, once again, catching him off guard.

"Well standing around here thinking isn't going to figure anything out!" Mabel pouted, sticking out her bottom lip "Bip needs to go back to the Shack, I'm tired, _you're_ tired, we all need to sleep!"

Dipper blinked a moment then sighed, defeated once more by Mabel's odd logic. He moved and got Bip's other arm over his shoulder. Moving his shoulder slightly to make sure his grip was decent, he gave Mabel a slight nod. Her eyes narrowed at him.

"Are the bags under your eyes gone?" she commented.

Dipper shrugged "I don't know. I can't see my eyes."

"Oh." Mabel frowned "Good point. And it's also dark so….eh, let's get going." She yawned near the end of her sentence as she took her first step forward.

It took the two of them a little bit to get the hang of walking like that. So close to each other, carrying their unconscious brother between them like a sheet. Bip's feet kept catching on roots and rocks and such and his slippers kept falling off. Eventually Mabel just took them off entirely and carried them herself. She knew Bip like this pair. Plain yellow. Mabel thought they could use some glitter but Bip seemed content with them in their simpleness, so she left them alone.

It was still dark, they could hardly see anything in front of them. Luckily the sky was bright with stars and the moon so where the trees didn't cover the sky, they had a decent enough view. Slowly they made their way along, listening to nothing but their own breathing and the sound of their feet breaking through layers of pine needles. On occasion, the sound of Bip's foot catching on something.

Mabel and Dipper both looked into nothing. Mabel's nose was scrunched up, her eyes narrowed as she watched intently ahead. Dipper had a rather concentrated frown, his eyes practically closed as he mumbled to himself. He didn't see Mabel start to stare at him.

"What kind of slippers should I make next?" she asked Dipper, breaking the silence. Her brother gave her a confounded stare of 'what' before tilting his head slightly.

"Er… Well he really seems to like that tortoise." He said.

"Tortoise?" Mabel blinked.

"Mr. Turtle." Dipper rolled his eyes.

"Then why did you say he was a tortoise?"

"Because he is."

"But Bip called him Mr. Turtle."

"Bip is weird."

"No duh."

The two petered off into an awkward silence. Mabel turned her attention to Bip. His face seemed lax, his hair an awkward matted curtain of brown flopped to one side. His breathing was normal although his mouth hung open slightly. Mabel sighed and turned her head forward.

"So….Slippers that look like tortoises?" she asked.

Dipper gave a curt nod, noticed Mabel wasn't looking at him, then said "Yeah. That sounds good."

Another pause.

"Wh-" she took a breath and tried again "What are we going to tell Stan?"

Dipper almost dropped Bip. He stared at her like she grew an extra head. " _Tell Stan?"_ he repeated "We can't tell Stan!"

"Why not?" Mabel asked. Her tone was accusing even though she didn't raise her voice.

"Stan doesn't even believe in the supernatural!" Dipper shouted. He heard his voice echo in the woods, blushed slightly, and lowered his voice. "How do we explain that without have it sounding like demons and things?"

Mabel frowned "I-I don't know! But maybe we should tell him?"

Dipper furrowed his brows and thought for a moment. Too many things could go wrong. But then again a lot of things could go right. What should they do? He looked at Bip and could tell Mabel did the same.

"…Should we ask him?" Mabel asked.

Dipper nodded "Yeah. Let's wait until he wakes up and then figure it out."

Mabel nodded to show her agreement and that was that.

It took them until the sky was graying to get back to the Shack. When they did, they found Stan sitting on the couch on the porch, drinking a soda. He spewed it out when he saw them, threw the can onto the ground, and approached them.

"What in blue blazing happened to you three!?" he yelled. Somehow he managed to sound angry. Dipper and Mabel both looked at him with half-asleep eyes. Dipper's strange wakefulness wore off and he was left the always-tired boy he was. Mabel was just exhausted but giggled none the less.

'Blue Blazing'.

Hahaha….

"We fell down some stairs." Dipper lied.

Stan raised a brow.

"A lot of stairs." Mabel elaborated. "In the woods."

Stan didn't seem convinced but didn't ask any more questions. "You three go clean up!" he rubbed his head "Er…two. I guess. Bip can do it when he wakes up." His voice lowered in a way that maybe was supposed to sound authoritative "And you three are grounded."

Neither of the two conscious triplets had an argument for that. Stan took Bip from them with relative ease and ushered the other two off to the bathroom. He then took Bip up to their room.

Dipper and Mabel exchanged a look and Dipper shrugged, making his way to the living room. Mabel sighed briefly before going to the bathroom. The house was eerily quiet. Gray.

Mabel turned on the sink and splashed some water and her face first and foremost, trying to get rid of some of the crust around her eyes and bring back some wakefulness. She didn't want to sleep. Not until she was sure Bip was okay. After a situation like that, how could he be?

She grabbed a towel and rubbed at her face for a few moments. Habit made her take her toothbrush and scrub at her teeth. Her pre-bedtime tradition made her reach for her nightshirt but she quickly realized it was not there. A soft sigh and grabbed her brush and ran it through her hair a few times. It dawned on her that she didn't care enough to do a thorough job and put the brush back.

Mabel left the bathroom and went back to usher Dipper in. He was snoring, fast asleep, on the couch. Mabel didn't both to wake him up. Instead, she yawned deeply and rubbed at her eyes. It was really early by now. But… she won't sleep until she was sure Bip was alright…

She sunk to the floor by the recliner and yawned again. She'll stay awake… until…

….

Soon both Dipper and Mabel were snoring in the living room.

* * *

Fire fire fire fire fire fire

Heat heat heat heat

Blue

Yellow

Blue

Yellow

Pine tree

Shooting star

Fez symbol

Six fingers

Glasses

Llama

Stitched heart

Ice bag

Pentagram-

 **P** _E_ _ **N**_ **T** A **G** _ **R**_ A _M_

 _SHOOTING STAR-_

 _MABEL. IT'S MABEL_

 _HE HURT MABEL_

 _HE HURT DIPPER_

 _PINE TREE_

 _MY BROTHER_

 _HE HURT MY BROTHER AND MY SISTER_

 _HE HURT THEM_

 _I SHOULD HURT HIM-_

 _…_

I already did….

…

…

…

Dipper and Mabel were there…

Mabel… knocked me out….?

Why…

…

…Because I hurt someone

 _HE DESERVED IT_

….

…

I hurt someone…

…

He did deserve it. I don't regret it. But….

…

It doesn't make it right….

…

But who cares if it was right!?

….

…

But if I start thinking like that, how much further would I go?

…..

…

..

.

Bip blinked his eyes open, his head throbbing faintly and his eyes felt strained. Sunlight filtered into the room through a drawn curtain. A pink blanket was drawn up to just under his chest. An overly-fluffed pillow was under his head.

Rubbing at his eyes, he slowly sat up and looked around.

He was back in their room at the shack. Did he just imagine all that?

Bip shook his head and frowned. No, not even going to consider that.

He fidgeted with the sheets between his fingers. Soft. Pink. It was Mabel's. He looked about again. She was nowhere to be seen.

The sounds of footsteps could be heard down stairs. Mabel's voice, Stan's questions, Dipper's silence-

Bip shook his head.

No, no. You can't hear silence.

But he could taste color. And see sound. Feel smells.

Bip rubbed at his temples.

 _Latrop eht nepo._

There it was.

That was fun.

A grin stretched over his face. It was fun. Fun and empowering.

 _"BIP!"_

He remembered the ghost of Dipper's cry. Suddenly the fun felt more like anger. Guilt. Regret. Shame. Sadism.

That was…. That wasn't right.

Bip shook his head and then clutched at it, tears blurring his vision. His knees drawn to his chest, he took long and shuddering breaths. Mabel's blankets bunched up around him. His stomach twisted.

Quickly he scrambled out of the bed, fell onto the floor, got back to his feet. He threw open the window and vomited out of it.

Coughing, he wiped at his mouth. His eyes hurt. Slowly, he moved his hand and stared at it. A flash of the memory of the fire came back. Suddenly his hand turned black in his mind's eye. Blue flames danced along the fingertips. His to control. His to do whatever he wanted with.

No.

He clenched his fists and dropped his arm to his side. Dipper and Mabel didn't need a repeat of that. Dipper and Mabel didn't need to know or worry about this. This was for him. For him and him alone.

…

Whatever it was.

He shoved his hands into his short's pockets (his windbreaker seemed to have disappeared. Probably being cleaned) and he skipped down the stairs. The sound of Mabel's declaration of his waking broke the relative quietness and both her and Dipper met him at the base.

"Bip-" Dipper started.

"How are you feeling?" Mabel asked, her eyes wide. Stan stood a bit off to the side, his head tilted slightly. Bip mimicked the older man's expression and then gave a grin.

"I'm completely fine!"

 **A/N**

 **So yeah, I'd like to say I know I write a lot of this through Bip's perspective, but can you really blame me? There's so much going through that boy's head. Next chapter goes back to the canon episodes but with a bit more of a twist.**

 **…**

 **So anyway I have to say I'm SUPER excited to write Double Dipper.**

 **Post-Credit (A/N) Short**

Dipper and Mabel sat on the porched, their chins in their hands, propped up on their knees in a similar fashion.

"So he doesn't…." Dipper muttered, trailing off.

"He doesn't remember?" Mabel finished for him.

They looked at eachother for a moment.

"Let's wait until we tell Stan." Dipper said, frowning.

Mabel chewed on a lock of her hair "…okay."

"Hey what are we rambling about?" Bip interrupted, settling down besides Mabel and handing her a soda. He reached across her and gave Dipper one too.

Mabel seemed instantly chipper "Wondering why you call Mr. Turtle a turtle when he's a tortoise."

Bip rolled his eyes. "Because it sounds cuter, duh."

Dipper looked annoyed and took a sip of his soda "Of course."

"Makes sense to me!" Mabel grinned.


	6. Chapter 6

**The Inconveniencing**

"Uh-oh, looks like someone's in LOVE~!" Mabel grinned, poking at Dipper's arm as the triplets watched Wendy leave with her friends.

"I can see what's happening!" Bip butted in, suddenly singing.

"What?" Dipper said, his voice raising in the question.

"And he doesn't have a clue!" Mabel picked up on the song and swept in to stand side by side with Bip.

"STOP SINGING!" Dipper interrupted, pushing them apart. He explained hastily, flailing his hands about "I DON'T have a crush on Wendy!" His face was red as he shrugged, trying to dismiss the topic "I mean, it's not like I stay awake at night THINKING about her or anything!"

That Night….

"Oh no." Dipper said as he stared at the ceiling. A pillow was promptly thrown in his face.

"GO TO BED, MORON!"

(Insert Theme Song Here)

"Hey how about I- WE, go with you!" Dipper stammered awkwardly, dragging his two siblings into a situation that one of them didn't want to be in and the other was just mildly surprised by. After a short explanation of Dipper's lie of being thirteen and why they were going, Mabel gave an expression Dipper caught quickly.

"Hey Bip, can you go make sure they don't leave without us?" Dipper asked suddenly "I-er- I left something upstairs."

"Lemme guess, your journal?" Bip rolled his eyes.

Dipper chuckled "Yeah."

"And I need to brush my teeth." Mabel grinned. She waved "Meet you out there!"

Bip's eye brow rose skeptically and he gave a limp wave back before trudging out the screendoor. Dipper and Mabel watched until he was out of sight and then went into the living room. Mabel kept her voice low.

"Dipper, should we really go?" she asked. "I mean-"

"Don't worry, I'm sure Bip will be fine." Dipper reassured her "What's the chance of that happening again?" Mabel fidgeted a moment, chewing on a lock of her hair. Dipper frowned in return, unsure of his own answer upon seeing his sister so distressed. Suddenly, he lifted his head a bit "Do you still have that amulet?"

Mabel stared at him, dumfounded a moment, but then mutely nodded. "Why?"

"Bring it." Dipper said with a proud smirk "If he goes nuts again, we'll just knock him out."

"But Dipper-" Mabel started before the sound of a teenage boy hollered for them to hurry up.

"It'll be fine!" Dipper chirped, rushing to join up with the group. Mabel frowned after him and gave a frustrated kick to the T-Rex skull in the room. She picked up the throw pillow off of the recliner and gave a frustrated scream into it. After a moment, she dropped it back onto the chair and grudgingly got the amulet. She gripped it into her balled fist and muttered angrily under her breath. At the door, Mabel inhaled deeply and then practiced a grin. She swung open the door-

"OW!" came the sharp cry. Mabel jumped a little and looked behind the now-open door to see her brother rubbing at his nose.

"Oh! Bip, are you alright?" she yelped, running to him.

Bip shot her a glare "Yah, ah'm fahne." His voice was muddled up by his hands on his nose that Mabel couldn't help but giggle at. Bip blinked for a moment and then grinned widely. "Does mah voice sound thaaaattt wweeeeeeeiiirddddd?" he drew out his words and that just made Mabel giggle harder.

"Yeah, it does-" she chuckled. She took a breath to regain herself but couldn't help the giggles that littered her words "You sure you're okay?"

Bip removed his hands from his face and blew his nose into his sleeve. Mabel scrunched up her own face in disgust but it was quickly replaced with a smile.

"You got a handkerchief?" she asked.

Bip stuck out his bottom lip in a pout as he pulled several colored cloths out of his sleeve "It's no fun if you know what I'm doing- What?" he blinked.

Mabel giggled a bit. "Sorry, sorry. Your voice sounds really, _really_ nasally right now."

"Oh man." He frowned. "Really?"

"Yeah." Mabel grinned. She gave him a light shove "Don't worry about it, Bippity. I'm sure no one will _nose-_ tice."

Bip chuckled at that "Yeah whatever. You ready to go?"

"Yep! Were you waiting on me?" she blinked as she hopped down the steps.

"Only _forever_." Bip muttered, rolling his eyes and following her.

"Sorry." Mabel shrugged. "Decided to grab something really quick."

"I'm assuming that 'something' is what's in your hand right now?" Bip asked. Mabel stiffened a bit but quickly relaxed, hoping her brother didn't notice.

"Yep!" she chirped. Bip tilted his head.

"Are you going to tell me what it is?" he asked.

"Nope!" Mabel chirped. Bip's response was an annoyed glare.

"Well alrighty then." He muttered.

"Hey guys!" Dipper called, waving from where the group was huddled in front of a rather run-down van "Hurry up!"

"Coming Dipping Dots!" Bip and Mabel called at the same time. They exchanged a look and then both suppressed a giggle girlishly.

"Let's go and meet up with them." Bip chuckled. Mabel nodded eagerly, pocketing the amulet, and they half-skipped, half-raced to rejoin the group.

* * *

From how Bip was muttering under his breath, his arms crossed, and his eyes narrowed, Mabel had come to the conclusion that Bip did not particularly like Wendy and her friends.

They were in the van speeding off to some unknown destination, and the triplets had taken the seats in the back. Dipper was chewing on a pen nervously, no doubt put on edge at the thought of actually talking to Wendy. Mabel kicked her feet lightly, trying to calm herself down by humming lightly and listening to the banter of the teens

and Bip, on occasion.

"So then I told him" Robbie said, going off on a clearly made-up story "Hey, why don't YOU find somewhere else to sit. And then I totally beat him up."

"I bet you met Abraham Lincoln afterwards, eh Stitched-Heart?" Bip muttered.

"Stitched-Heart?" Robbie looked back and eyed him "What does that even mean?"

Bip motioned toward his hoodie "You got a stitched-heart on your hoodie. And I don't care enough to remember your name, so you're Stitched-Heart now."

"Oh, wow." Robbie muttered, rolling his eyes "Look who's got an attitude. Look at me, I don't care enough to remember someone's name- because I can't!" Robbie poorly mimicked Bip's voice "Because I'm dumb!"

"Wow." Bip huffed. He rolled his eyes and mimicked Robbie rather well "Hey look, my name is Robbie. I need to cover more than half my face with my bangs to be taken seriously." He laughed and settled back into his seat "Listen buddy, you are FORGETABLE. Hell, I care to remember THOMPSON more than I care to remember you."

"Yay!" Thompson seemed happy to hear this.

"Woah man, calm down." Wendy said, frowning.

"I'll think about it." Bip spat. Mabel put a hand on his shoulder, frowning slightly. Bip took the hint and leaned back into his seat, mumbling. Robbie seemed to take this as a victory.

"Yeah that's right, be scared-"

"Robbie, dude, you need to shut up." Dipper interrupted. The entire group turned to look at him, save for Thompson who had to settle for staring via mirror.

"I'm sorry Junior, what was that?" Robbie said with a slight scowl.

Dipper blushed but took a deep breath "You need to shut up. I don't like the way you're talking to my brother."

"Well-!" Robbie was interrupted by a light smack.

"Just drop it." Wendy said. She turned and gave Dipper a smile, zipping her fingers across her lips. Dipper blushed a bit and nervously returned the gesture.

"Way to stick up for your brother!" Lee grinned.

"Yeah, nice." Nate said.

"Thank Dipping Sauce." Bip shot Dipper a smile. Then he quickly pouted, muttering under his breath "Although I could've stuck up for myself."

Dipper laughed. "I'm sure you could." He then awkwardly shrugged into himself. Mabel reached over Bip and gave Dipper an affectionate punch.

"Nice." She smiled and then gave a wink "Of course you only speak up when it comes to us."

"Woah really?" Tambry commented, barely glancing up from her phone. She quickly went back to texting "That's adorable."

"A-adorable?" Dipper flushed.

"Super cute." Robbie snorted, smirking smugly over his shoulder. Dipper glared back at him as Bip shot the teen a glare, his pupils contracting for a moment. Mabel decided to get in between them.

"So anyway, where are we going?" She chirped.

"The old abandoned convenience store." Wendy said, eyeing Bip but speaking calmly. "Hey Robbie, knock it off."

Robbie opened his mouth to respond but settled for a mopey silence, crossing his arms and looking very similar to Bip a few moments before. Wendy gave a grin and looked over to Dipper.

"Hey man, I thinks it's cool you stick up for your siblings." She said.

"R-Really?" Dipper stammered, a grin stretching across his face.

"Yeah! I got three little brothers, so I get it." She chirped back.

"But I'm younger than Dipper by, like, ten minutes." Bip muttered.

"Oh so Dipper _is_ your big brother!"

"But I'm taller than him."

That earned a laugh Bip didn't understand and Dipper turned bright red to, turning to Bip in (comical) rage.

Eventually, the group reached the convenience store and decided to enter it. Dipper was on the fence.

Er…literally. He was literally on the fence. He couldn't get down.

"Come on, Dipper!" Bip called up.

"You can do it!" Mabel beamed.

Dipper glowered down at his siblings "Easy for you two to say! You fall off of things this high all the time!"

Bip and Mabel exchanged sheepish looks. "Hey, to be fair." Bip defended himself "I only jumped off the roof _once."_

"And the highest I ever jumped down from was the top bunk." Mabel shrugged. Dipper muttered some protests under his breath. Lee, who had clambered on top of the fence, picked Dipper up and dropped him off. Bip and Mabel, had their reflexes been more fine-tuned, would have caught him.

…But they weren't. So. Dipper fell on the ground.

"Nice job throwing the kid off the fence." Nate praised, punching Lee in the arm. They proceeded to partake in friendly banter as the two siblings helped their other sibling up.

"You okay?" Bip asked.

"Yep." Dipper muttered. He spotted Wendy looking at them out of the corner of his eye and immediately straightened up, dusting his legs off. "That was easy." He said, putting his hands on his hips. Bip rolled his eyes while Mabel suppressed a giggle. "What?" Dipper asked. Bip and Mabel went on ahead. "Wait- Come on guys!"

Robbie tried to open the door and failed. While they were muttering about what to do next, Dipper decided to simply climb to the roof, punch down a (steel) grate and unlock the door from the inside. All the teens praised him, Mabel and Bip high fiving him as they went inside.

"Well. Now what do we do?" Dipper asked.

"Anything we want." Wendy smirked, leaning against the counter. On that, the group shot off in different directions.

"Come on, Bip!" Mabel squealed, grabbing her brother's arm and dragging him off.

"Byyeeee Diiippeerrr and…." He thought for a moment then dropped it "Byyeeeee…."

Wendy and Dipper watched them go.

"Hey, Dipper." Wendy said.

"Y-yeah-" Dipper's voice cracked. He cleared his throat and tried again, making his voice much deeper than it needed to be "Yeah?"

"I don't think your brother likes me that much." Wendy said, looking off after him. "Which is cool and all, I don't need everyone to like me. Just wondering if I did anything wrong."

Dipper sighed and shook his head "No. Bip just doesn't like anyone."

Wendy laughed "Oh, he's one of _those_ types. All right, I get it." She jerked a thumb over her shoulder "Want to eat some of that ice cream and see if it's spoiled?"

Dipper grinned up at her "Yeah I do!"

Meanwhile, a few aisles away Bip and Mabel were messing with the assortment of squeaky dog toys. Mabel picked one up, squeezing it and softly squealing at delight at the noise.

"Hey Bip-" she turned to look at him and cut herself off. Bip was sitting on the floor, looking vacantly at his hands. "Something wrong?"

Bip shot up straight and frantically shook his head "Nah! I'm fine! Tired maybe. It's pretty late."

"You're _always_ tired." Mabel rolled her eyes. Bip chuckled.

"Yeah, I guess you're right." He didn't say anything else. Mabel frowned and turned back to the assortment of squeaky toys. She squeezed a different one, but half-heartedly. Her thoughts wandered off to the events of the other day and she felt a heavy weight on her heart. Perhaps she should tell Stan? Or…at least Bip?

Taking a deep breathe of resolve she turned to confront her brother. And failed. She lost her nerve and tried again, taking in a long breathe. And again failed. Mabel repeated this process several more time until a loud _crash_ echoed behind her, accented by the slightly comedic sigh of squeaky dog toys. She jumped and turned to find that Bip had fallen into the crate and was now trying to push himself out of it, gripping his head and mumbling something underneath his breathe.

"Bip!" Mabel yelped. She rushed over and put her arms around her brother's shoulders, pulling him up.

"Thanks Mabel…" Bip said quietly, his voice a whispy sigh. He chuckled. "I forgot to stand up."

She knew it was a lie but didn't say anything.

"Silly Billy." Mabel chuckled. Bip inhaled sharply making his sister jump "…Bip?"

He seemed to be staring into another world. "I…don't…" he looked up at her a moment, the pupils in his eyes contracting into lines but quickly dilated outwards again. He but his lip as if trying to find the words to say. Mabel smiled softly, swallowing down her own concern.

"Do you wanna go home?" she asked "We can go get Dipper-"

"No!" Bip snapped a bit too loudly. He blushed a little and lowered his voice "Dipper will get all embarrassed and these assholes will probably use it as an excuse to insult him."

Mabel decided not to point out her brother's use of profanity. "Bip, if you're not feeling well-"

"I'm FINE!" Bip hissed, pulling away from her. Evidentially, he was not fine as the moment he was without her support he fell onto his hands and knees. Mabel yelped, racing to support her brother and yelled over her shoulder:

"DIPPER!" she turned and went back to fretting over Bip, holding him up. His eyes were squeezed shut, and he squirmed lightly in his sister's hold. "Come on, Bippity…" Mabel whimpered. She took a steadying breathe. Slowly, she stroked his hair in a way she's seen their mother do so many times before. "It's alright, it's okay…"

"I'm fine, Mabel…" Bip said in a hushed voice, trying to get up. He failed, collapsing back down onto her lap. He cringed, turning into her arms and squeezing his eyes shut.

"Mabel, what is it?" Dipper called as he ran up to them, skidding to land on his knees and kneeling in front of Bip. "What happened?"

"I don't know!" Mabel said, not being able to keep her voice from cracking. "He just collapsed!"

"Bip?" Dipper blinked, shaking him lightly "Come on man, what's up?"

"I'm fine!" Bip snapped, trying to sit up to no avail. At this point, the three preteens have drawn the attentions of their older companions.

"What's going on?" Lee blinked.

"Woah dude, you okay?" Nate frowned. Thompson chewed on his nails, looking around at his friends frantically.

"I-is he alright?" he asked. Robbie responded with a light snort, flipping his bangs. Tambry's eyes widened slightly, her mouth distorted into a small frown.

"Little Dude okay?" she asked, casting a glance to Wendy. She shrugged, looking pretty confused.

"I don't know." She said. She knelt down on the other side of Bip "Dude?"

" **I** _'_ M _F_ **I** N _E!"_ Bip hissed, pulling away from Wendy and retreating into his sister's embrace. Mabel held him tighter. Dipper frowned.

"All right man, we're gonna head home." Dipper said, resolve leaking from his voice. He got to his feet and Mabel slowly rose too, supporting Bip. The youngest triplet's face was a vibrant red.

"I'm f-fine, really…." Bip frowned.

"Dude, it's okay." Dipper said "We'll get going-"

The door slammed shut.

" _Young Trespassers… Welcome to your graves."_ A low voice boomed out. The group glared about.

"U-uh, Mister or Miss Ghost or Something" Mabel said, looking around for the assumed apparition "Our brother is really sick. Can we please just leave and get him home?"

"Yeah, c'mon!" Dipper said, trying not to growl even though his lips were twitching at the corners.

" _You should have thought about that before breaking into our store, dearies."_ Murmured a higher voice.

"Look, we're sorry for coming in here without permission." Dipper said "But our brother is _really_ sick and we need to get him home."

" _Just like teenagers to barge in without thinking."_ The first voice spoke again.

"Dude, come on!" Dipper yelled, sweat slicking down the sides of his face. He motioned to the swaying Bip "Can't you see he's sick!?"

"Dipper-" Mabel muttered, hauling her half-unconscious brother along as she spoke to Dipper quietly "They seem to have a problem with teenagers, right? Just tell them we're not teens-"

Dipper hastily spoke again "We're not causing any problems! Please just let us go!"

"Dipper!" Mabel snapped. She hugged Bip to her protectively "Now's not the time!"

Dipper seemed to make a point of ignoring her "So just open the doors-"

Mabel quickly shoved Bip into Wendy's (confused) grip and then harshly pushed her conscious brother. She turned and yelled up at the ceiling "We're not teenagers, okay!? We're twelve and our brother's sick-" tears started pricking at her eyes "And we just want to take him home, okay!?"

The teens all stared at the small girl. Then at Dipper, then to where Bip slumped awkwardly against Wendy. Dipper's eyes were stuck on his sister, a frown creasing his lips. He gripped his wrist and turned away from Mabel, poking at the ground with his foot.

" _Er… Well…."_ Said the low voice again. Above them, two figures materialized to reveal an elderly couple. The old man scratched at his head. _"Well I guess if you're not teenagers, you could go."_

The doors opened.

"Thank you!" Mabel chirped. She reached for Bip-

" _But first, do you know any cute little dances?"_ said the ghost.

"What?" Wendy muttered.

"What kind of question is that!?" Lee snapped. Wrong thing to say. The ghost flared up, bigger and sparking red, nerves stringing the bulging shapes of his eyes. The doors once again slammed shut.

" _ **HOW RUDE OF YOU!"**_ he roared. Lee cringed, retreating back to his friends. Nate shot him a pointed glare.

"DUDE, WHAT THE HELL!?" Robbie snapped, giving the blond a sharp shove.

"LEE!" Tambry growled.

"S-sorry!" Lee stammered.

Wendy wrapped her arms tighter around Bip. Her eyes narrowed into a glare, accented by the shadow of her bangs. Dipper and Mabel immediately reached for each other, pulling the other one in close. For each of them, one hand flew back instantly as if to grab a third person. They pulled their arms back in to each other.

" _ **PREPARE TO STAY HERE FOR ALL ETERNITY-"**_

"Wait!" Dipper yelled, ripping himself away from Mabel. The ghosts glowered down on him. He blushed madly, but cleared his throat and said in a cracking voice "I do know the….lamby lamby dance…." He avoided looking at the group behind him.

This seemed to calm the ghosts down.

" _Go on."_ Said the old woman.

Dipper took a deep breathe. He sighed, looked back at the group he came in with. Bip captured his stare for a moment and he sighed and turned back.

"I…." suddenly his face brightened "I can't do it without a lamb costume, so-"

The ghost snapped and he was suddenly adorned in an adorable footie lamb costume. Dipper's face turned red, only to burn redder at the giggles that sounded behind him. He cleared his throat again. Took another breathe,

And burst out into an adorable song.

At the end, the ghosts applauded.

" _That was some fine girly dancing, boy."_ Said the old man. _"Your friends are free to go."_ The doors opened again. Dipper quickly thanked them, not questioning the spontaneous costume change back to his regular clothes. He turned on heel, grabbed Mabel's arm and dragged her out of the building, hiding his red face with the brim of his hat. Wendy followed close, carrying the sleeping Pines member. The rest of the group huddled together and followed Wendy, murmuring amongst themselves.

It was a short but tiring walk back to the van. Wendy set Bip down in the back seat, leaning against the window and Mabel quickly crawled in besides him. Dipper fidgeted, not looking at anyone. A hand on his should made him look.

"Hey man." Wendy smiled at him "That was pretty cool of you to do that for your brother."

Dipper smiled lightly, although still thoroughly embarrassed "T-thanks Wendy."

Mabel pulled Bip to her and clung onto him like the fate of the world depended on it. Dipper frowned, looking at them as Wendy moved away, settling down in the front seat.

"Hey…" Dipper muttered, rubbing his arm "I'm sorry about all that…."

"It's okay." Mabel smiled at him "You did just completely embarrass yourself to get us out of there. It's okay." She repeated. Her eyes turned back to Bip "…Maybe we should let Bip rest a while, huh?" Dipper nodded.

"Dontcha mean rest.. a 'bip'….?" Came a soft, dry chuckle "…Sorry… Nice dancing though, Dip Dops…."

Dipper snorted "Shut up."

"…kay…" Bip yawned, falling deeply asleep. Dipper caught the yawn, copied it, and also leaned against Mabel. The girl smiled, drew both her brothers in close, and nestled back into the seat.

* * *

 **A/N**

… **So I lied about the update-twice-a-month thing. Sorry. This chapter is really long though so hopefully that makes up for it? Please leave a review, if you want!**

 **Post- Credit (A/N) scene:**

Dipper and Mabel thanked Thompson for driving them home and waved them a goodbye. Wendy gave Dipper a wink before they left. Then the two triplets dragged their sleeping brother up to the house when a TV crashed through the window.

Stan peeked out "Uh… couldn't find the remote-" his eyes caught on Bip and he snorted "How many times you two gonna drag your knocked-out brother home this summer?"

Mabel laughed "Hopefully this'll be the last time." Dipper chuckled along and Stan allowed himself a few laughs. When they quieted down, a sleepy voice muttered:

"Wouldn't count on it."

His siblings and Uncle gave him an incredibly perturbed look.


	7. Chapter 7

**Dipper vs Manliness**

Something was going on with his siblings that day, but Bip couldn't find it in himself to care that much. Dipper and Mabel were very understanding of it. Mabel had promised to bring him back something from the Diner and had held true to that, bringing him back some pancakes. Then they had left him alone in their room to allow him to rest and enjoy himself. Mabel had insisted, however, that he rest in her bed that day and to call one of them should he need anything. He nodded along, yawning, and settled into his sister's bedding.

Mabel had smiled, tucked him in, and smooched his forehead before closing the bedroom door and skipping down the stairs. Bip smiled underneath the blankets and turned onto his side, closing his eyes. For once, he felt physically comfortable as he busied his mind with going through the Fibonacci Numbers to smother the constant whispering of the command given to him at birth.

He yawned, settling in deeper to the pillows and eventually found himself asleep. In his dreams, his smile grew. He was weightless. Limitless. There were no boundaries for him. A wave of his hand and reconstruction of land. He can snap, and mighty trees would break apart like twigs. Time had no meaning and meanings were meaningless.

There was no harm enjoying a dream.


	8. Chapter 8

**Double Dipper**

"BIP!" Mabel called, racing into the living room at high speeds. She skidded to a halt, stopping right in front of where her brother was seated on the recliner, leaning heavily on one harm and sipping out of a juice pouch. The girl flailed her arms about wildly, screaming the boy's nickname all the while he simply sat and watched her with little interest. When she stopped to breathe, Bip took his chance to ask

"What?"

Mabel took a breathe and excitedly blurted out "Grunkle Stan says we're going to have a party!"

Bip dropped the juice pouch, eyes wide. A wide grin stretched across his faced and he jumped up from his seat "WE'RE GONNA HAVE A PARTY!? I LOVE PARTIES!"

"I KNOW YOU LOVE PARTIES THAT'S WHY I WAS SO EXCITED TO TELL YOU!" Mabel grinned.

"WHAT'S THE PARTY FOR?" Bip asked loudly.

"I HAVE NO IDEA!" Mabel replied just as loudly.

"WAIDDAMINUTE, WHO CARES?"

"GOOD POINT. PARTY!"

Then the two siblings took turns screaming their excitement back and forth. Dipper had walked into the room at some point, casually picked up a pen he left in there, and left without so much as a change in expression.

(Insert Theme Song Here)

Dipper took great care in dressing that night, though not really. He pretty much wore his normal outfit, but with a bow tie. Straightening it with much care, he reached over and sprayed himself with deodorant for once. Again studying himself in the mirror, he was quickly shoved out of the way.

"My turn for the mirror, Pine Tree." Bip chirped as his brother rubbed his head, glaring at him.

"'Pine Tree'?" He muttered. Bip blinked, grinning a bit forcefully while giving a casual shrug.

"'Cause, y'know, there's a pine tree on your hat and stuff." He explained, turning his attention to the mirror. He was also wearing a bowtie tonight. But unlike Dipper, he actually did change his outfit. He lost the windbreaker and khakis in their entirety, so he simply sported a neon-pink tank top, black shorts, and a pair of black wristbands. His slippers were very-much-overly-sparkly pink, bedazzled out of this plane of existence and adorned with googly eyes and antennas made of pipe-cleaners.

"New nickname!" Mabel chirped "Nice job, Dipper!"

Dipper snorted "Yeah, okay." He stumbled to his feet and dusted himself off "But nothing's going to distract me tonight!" he smirked, jerking a thumb to himself "'Cause I'm going to ask Wendy to dance."

"Oh boy…" Mabel sighed "You didn't make one of those overly-complicated-listy-things, did you?"

"What-?" Dipper blushed "Of course not. It's very easy to follow." He took out a ridiculously long roll of paper as he said this, unfolding it to show off the plan in its entirety. Bip snorted.

"Was it really necessary to make the paper THAT long? I mean, if you wrote smaller you could've written it on a normal piece of paper." He muttered.

"But then it wouldn't look as well thought out." Dipper said matter-of-factly. Bip rolled his eyes.

"Yeah. So instead you killed like, five trees." He muttered.

"Tree killer." Mabel nodded her agreement. She then chuckled briefly, coughed into her balled fist and went on "Seriously Dipper, just walk up and talk to her like a normal person."

"Step Seven, sister!" Dipper grinned, showing off the well-thought plan.

Mabel sighed in defeat, seeing no way to sway Dipper. Instead, she directed her attention to Bip.

"So what are you going to do at the party?" she asked.

"Party, duh." Bip shrugged. He grinned "Aw man though, I can't WAIT! I wonder what kind of music there'll be? And food? How many people?" He hummed to himself.

"But don't you, like, HATE people?' Mabel blinked.

"Normally, yes." Bip said "But in a party, not so much."

Mabel laughed "You're weird, Bippity-Bop."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know." Bip waved her off. "Now what are we doing still standing around up here!? Let's go party! C'mon! C'mon!" He chanted, pushing both of his siblings out the door and down to the party. Mabel laughed, running ahead of her brothers. Dipper rolled his eyes and simply walked down the stairs, studying his list intently.

Bip stopped as his siblings went on without him. A frown on his face, he fumbled with his bowtie a moment. A quick sigh, a quick stretch, and a light smack on either side of his face and he grinned and followed.

And the party for the most part was going pretty well. For Bip and Mabel. Dipper once again found some way to complicate his own life, ending up getting thrown into a closet by a small army of clones. As the numbered Dippers mused amongst themselves, Bip came into the room, caked in glitter and cake frosting and reeking of spilled soda. He stood in the doorway, staring in awe.

The Dipper clones sweated nervously.

"Uh….Hey." The one dubbed Tyrone said with a wave.

"Hey." Bip said curtly. He counted them, then asked "Where's my brother? Like, the original. You didn't hurt him, did you?"

"Wha- No, of course not." Tyrone said.

"Yeah, we just threw him in the closet." Number Seven said.

"Oh, okay." Bip hummed. He looked between them a moment.

"Er…Anything else?" Number Eight asked.

Bip simply stared. Then grinned widely "CLONES! Why didn't I think of that?" He laughed to himself, then waved goodbye "Welp, see ya Dippers. I'm gonna go clone myself and REALLY get this party started!"

The Dippers blinked.

"Our brother's weird." One of them shrugged.

"MY brother!" The Dipper from the closet snapped.

"SHUDDUP!" Tyrone snapped back.

And as Dipper got himself in deeper into his hijinks, Bip set about to making the party more fun. He stretched out onto the dusty copier, pillowing his head in his folded arms. The machine sputtered to life, creaking and groaning as it spat out a newly printed paper. Bip rolled off of the machine, eager to greet his new friend/another him.

A moment or two passed before the copy fizzled to life, stumbling up to its feet.

"Hey there, handsome!" Bip greeted, waving. The duplicate didn't respond at first, stretching a few times. But this didn't surprise Bip much. He was always one for theatrics, after all.

But it did surprise him when his duplicate turned around. Grinning. Widely, baring all teeth. An insane twitch enveloping one…slit-pupiled, yellow eye.

" _Heya there!"_ Bip-Two chirped, sliding in close to the original.

"Oh- wow- hey." Bip gulped, taking a step back. Sweat slicked the side of his face as he pointed a shaky finger "Er….Something wrong with your eyes there…"

" _Hm? Really?"_ His clone hummed _"Nah, I think they're good."_ His grin somehow grew wider _"YOUR eyes are the ones that are messed up…."_ He flexed out his hand, blue flames engulfing them in an instant. _"Let's fix them up, hm?"_

Now, Bip wasn't a moron. Especially when it came to judging people. So, naturally, he instantly turned on heel and bolted for the door. His clone seemed to be a bit quicker, grabbing him by the neck and slapping one hand across his mouth.

Bip clawed wildly at the clone's arm, his nails coming away caked with peeled skin and dried ink. His clone spoke in his ear, his breath hot against his skin.

" _Dontcha worry, it'll be a quick eye-scoop."_

* * *

Wendy laughed, pushing Robbie away as he told a not-too-mature joke.

"Robbie, you jerk!" she giggled, pushing a strand of her hair behind her ear.

Robbie chuckled to himself, one hand on his hip as he looked out over the party.

"Yeah, I'm pretty hilarious, aren't I?" he smirked as he inspected to make sure his black nail polish was still evenly applied. Wendy rolled her eyes, taking a sip of her drink when she heard…something.

"Hey…did you hear that?" She asked, looking in the direction the sound came from. She couldn't quite make it out, but it seemed desperate. A chill went down her spine and she couldn't help but shudder.

"Wha? Nah, I didn't." Robbie shrugged "Hey, have you ever heard the one about the nun and the pastor?"

"Uh…No." Wendy blinked, brows furrowing. "Hey, I'll be right back, okay? I gotta….Go to the bathroom."

"Heh, okay." Robbie said "Be quick." He winked at her, shooting a finger gun. Wendy ducked underneath his arm, speed-walking past the dance floor where Mabel was preoccupied with her little party-competition. Her mouth set into a frown.

And really as she got to the bathroom her intent was just to splash some water on her face. But when she got there, she heard a harsh THUMP! She stopped, her hand freezing just before touching the door's knob. Listening intently, she heard a low crash _!_

She broke into a run, leaving the idea of the noises being her imagination far behind her. Skidding around corners, flying through the halls and slamming a door open. She only spared a moment to take in what exactly was happening before her.

There were two Bips. Strange enough but not quite jaw-dropping. However, one of them was very much pinned against the floor by his throat. His eyes were wide, shaking and watering and pale due to lack of oxygen. Weak fingers scrambled to claw at the hand that choked him. His assailant pressed a knee to his stomach, free hand wrapped about a small letter-opening knife. Aimed right at his eyes.

Wendy slammed into the hostile one, sending him flying and slamming into the distant wall. He screeched inhumanly, slit-pupiled eyes fixing on her and burning red. The Bip she had just saved scrambled backwards in pure terror, pressing himself against a wall as he struggled to fill his lung with air.

" _Heya Red!"_ The Insane-Bip purred, getting to his feet and grinning broadly _"Can't say I expected you to come to the rescue."_

"Dude, what the hell?" Wendy snapped.

" _Me!"_ He chirped. He then giggled gleefully to himself _"Damn I'm funny."_ Wendy glared, apparently not finding the joke amusing. The slit-pupiled boy rolled his eyes. _"I take it you don't like jokes? How boring."_

Blue flame licked up from his fingertips, and he brought his hand back so a faint glow outlined the frame of his face. White teeth gleamed with the firelight as he darted towards her quickly. Wendy quickly dodged out of the way, wrapping one of the boy's arms and twisting it, pinning him against the ground with one leg set firmly on his back. Despite the impressive display of reflex, the boy seemed unimpressed.

" _Egh. Annoying. Let's see if you can dodge fire, toots."_

Wendy knew what the meant. She scrambled backwards as he erupted into flames. But he didn't seem harmed. Instead, he simply sat calmly with his ankles crossed, grinning at her reaction.

" _What? Things got too hot for you to handle?"_ he chirped, titling his head slightly. A ball of paper hit him in the head, causing him the glare at the one who threw it. _"Well THAT was rude."_

Bip huffed, glaring "Y'know what else is rude? Gutting out someone's eyes."

The insane one shrugged _"Fair enough. Still dunno what that was supposed to do."_

Bip pointed upwards as the paper burned and the smoke brushed against the ceiling. His duplicate followed it for a moment, before laughing as the fire alarms went off and sprinkled turned on. Washing away the fire and the ink he was made off. But that damn grin remained ever-present. Even as he melted off into a puddle and spewed out his last words.

" _DO AS YOU'RE TOLD, BIPPITY!"_

And that was the last of that. Nothing left of that insanity besides some scorch marks, some mental scars, and a wet office. Bip clenched his fists to his side, shoulders shaking and eyes wide. Wendy slowly made her way next to him.

"Er…You okay, man?" She asked awkwardly. Bip responded by dropping to the ground, hugging his knees to his chest. Wendy sat gingerly next to him, rubbing his back reassuringly with a tad-bit forced smile. "Hey…Hey it's all right…."

"H-he was gonna c-c-cut out my eyes…." Bip sobbed. The façade had broke. He curled in on himself, shaking from cold and fear as water paltered his hair to his face. "H-e-he w-w-wass- H-e w-was g-gonna-" his incomprehensible sentence was made even more so by the hiccups that shook his body even more.

"Shh, shh…It's okay man." Wendy hushed him, putting an arm around his shoulders. She kept a small smile on her face "It's all right. It's done. It's over."

Bip broke into a wild sob, throwing himself against her in his fright. Sobs shaking his body, incomprehensible babble clouding his usual stoic personality. His fingers, sore and red and aching, dug into the back of her shirt. Wendy wrapped her arms around him, offering some sort of comfort with the physical reassurance.

"It's okay man, it's okay. I'm here…Shhh….It's okay…."

Bip continued to cling onto her. Long until after the sprinklers stopped and the smell of fire with it. She waited for him patiently. Although a bit tense.

Eventually he pulled away, wiping at his eyes and giving her a pointed glare.

"That didn't happen." He said curtly, blushing ever so slightly. Wendy chuckled, giving him a light shove.

"Sure thing, Bip."

"No. I mean all of that." Bip reiterated "The- The that thing, the fact I was crying and whatever. None of it. Got it?"

Wendy smiled softly "Yeah man, I got it."

"Good." Bip nodded in content, crossing his arms and still a flustered mess."Er…and….uh…..Thanks." He looked away, his blush ever more prominent.

"Yeah. Sure thing." Wendy smirked, ruffling his hair.

…

"Still don't like you."

"Whatever, man."

* * *

 **A/N**

 **Me to Bip: Why the FUCK you lyin', why you always lyin', oh my god, stop fuckin' lllllyyyyyin'.**

 **Anyway. Sorry update took so long. I actually had to write this twice because the original one got deleted and-…yeah I'm lying. The original DID get deleted but this one was written faster and better. So…. Yeah. Review, please?**

 **Post-A/N Short**

Bip hummed to himself, feeding his pet turtle as Mabel partied on with her new friends. His brother came by to sit next to him.

"Hey. How did the party with your clone go?" Dipper asked.

Bip puffed his cheeks out in a pout "Er….Let's just say I'm not surprised why I don't have friends."

"Oh c'mon man, couldn't have been that bad." Dipper shrugged.

"Whatever." Bip dismissed it "So Wendy's still here. You gonna ask her to dance?" Dipper flushed a light pink.

"Er…Y'know, I'll pass this time."

Bip couldn't help but chuckle "If ya insist man. Don't pass it up though, she's pretty cool."

Dipper eyed him "Hey, did something happen?"

"Yeah."

…

"You gonna tell me?"

"Nah."


	9. Chapter 9

**Irrational Treasure**

"Pioneer Day, huh?" Bip muttered, sipping from his soda can in an unimpressed manner. His free hand was placed on his hip, and he leaned heavily on that leg. Gravity Falls was usually more interesting than a ridiculous reenactment. Needless to say, he was bored.

But his siblings had wandered off somewhere as soon as they got to town. Bip's original plan was to go back to the shack with Stan, but that quickly went over the cliff and died on impact when Stan got himself thrown in 'Ye Stocks'. The old man _had_ implied he needed help, but being the little shit he was, Bip pretended to be oblivious and went along his merry little way.

The boy chuckled to himself, amused by his own antics. His soda now depleted, his made a show of kicking the can several times before dumping it into a trashcan. Now bored and free of the burden of a soda can, he set himself out to wander around, looking for something fun to do.

The streets were bare of cars, replaced instead with covered wagons drawn by horses (so about 2HorsePower each). For maybe ten minutes he entertained himself with scaring the poor equines and watching their panicked owners try to calm them down. But that quickly became dull. He yawned, tossing one more stone over his shoulder to hit a man in the face.

Then, Bip went about his merry little way once again. His solitary journey did not last long, however, as he soon ran into a familiar Red-Head.

"Hey Bip." Wendy waved as him, bring her bike to an abrupt stop. It skidded a bit, rocking forth on the front wheel a moment before settling onto the ground.

"Wow-gee, Miss" Bip said, mimicking the accent of a stereotypical paper-boy "Where didja get such a weirdo bike?"

Wendy snorted, smirking a bit. She hopped off of her bike, holding it up by the handle bars. "That seemed more 1950s then 1800s, man."

Bip rolled his eyes "Whatever. Y'still got it."

"Yeah I did." Wendy shrugged "So, you stuck here right now too?"

"Mmhmm." Bip nodded. He snorted, glaring out over the town "This is boring as FUCK."

"Dude." Wendy frowned "Aren't ya a bit young to be using that kind of language?"

"Nah." Bip said curtly.

"Fuck yeah." Wendy grinned "Ah man, I hate censoring myself."

"Yeah." Bip rolled his eyes "So, what do you want?"

Wendy frowned a bit mockingly "Aw, c'mon man, I just wanna hang around with someone who isn't obsessed with this whole 'Pioneer Day' thing."

"Fair 'nough." Bip said. He eyed her a moment "How okay are you spray-painting wagons?"

She shot him some fingers guns "Incredibly okay."

At that response, Bip produced a pair of spray-paint cans, grinning broadly "Sweet."

So the two wasted a few hours vandalizing private property due to boredom. By the time they were put of paint, several paintings of turtles and the typical graffiti were plastered on fences, walls, and anything else that was a relatively flat surface that didn't move too much.

"Welp!" Bip chirped, tossing the empty can over his shoulder "That was a whole lot of fun."

Wendy chuckled a bit under her breathe "D-dude, what is with your love of turtles?"

"They're tortoises." Bip pointed out. He crossed his arms over his chest, turning away in a melodramatic fashion "And I haven't the _slightest_ clue what you are talking about, Wendel!"

"pFffft- _Wendel?_ Dude, what the fuck? _"_ Wendy snorted. Bip grinned, shaking a finger chidingly at her.

"Tsk, tsk, Wendel. Such language will not be tolerated!" He said, pointing his nose upwards at her.

She rolled her eyes and shoved him playfully.

"You being a huge dork won't be tolerated!"

"Ow, my feelings." Bip pouted, sticking his bottom lip out. He rubbed at the bottoms of his eyes "You're makin me cwy."

"Sure am, dude." Wendy said, she leaned over the handlebars of her bike "Yo, man, I've been meaning to talk to you 'bout something."

"Oh boy." Bip muttered "Party Pooper train incoming" He pulled his arm down in a motion to mimic pulling a level "choo-coo."

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever." Wendy said. She frowned "Man, we gotta talk about what happened the other day. At the party, y'know?"

"No!" Bip snapped a bit too quickly. His face flushed red and he turned his gaze to avoid her shocked face.

"Bip, I think it's a bit important."

"Dontcha mean, it's a _bip_ important?" Bip grinned sheepishly, already telling his attempt to change the subject has failed. "R-really, it's not important."

"Man, I get you're scared." She said, putting a hand on his shoulder "That-…That was weird. Like, really, _really,_ weird. But it might lead to someone getting hurt-"

"I CAN HANDLE IT!" Bip snapped, shoving her arm away. His growled, baring his teeth at her and stepping away. Their eyes met again and he pretended not to see the flash of hurt in her eyes. "Sorry to burst your bubble, Wendel, but maybe y'can keep your nose out of MY BUSINESS, HUH?" The corners of his lips pulled upwards in a forced, but not kind, grin and his voice rose in pitch to almost a whistle "So how 'bout you just forget about it, kay?"

"No." She said bluntly. Her voice was level, but just barely. The boy could hear the tension rolling behind the dam of her voice. She was red.

Like…not just red-headed.

Her colors actually, were still there. Green shirt and eyes, brown freckles and red hair. But it was…internal, made external. Red, burning burning burning and stretching out, barely tamed flames. Bip could tell he was pushing her, just by seeing that red.

He forced himself to take a deep breathe, and he saw that red lose its intensity as he did. Dithering off into a dim lavender.

"Listen, Red" Bip muttered. Wendy's eyes narrowed in a way that answered his next question. So he gave up on the question entirely. Instead, he turned away again, rubbing at his arm "Okay,okay. So you won't just forget it. I get it…" He chewed on his li a moment "B-but…How 'bout we make a bit of a compromise, huh?"

Wendy rose an eyebrow "Like what?"

Bip sighed "Like, you don't bring it up again unless I do something that call for it, okay? Like, like if it's obvious someone will get hurt." He forced his voice not to shake.

Wendy hummed to herself a moment, drumming her fingers along her cheek. Then she sighed and gave a nod "Alright. Fine, fair enough. I get not wanting to talk about these sorts of things."

"Cool." Bip forced a smile. It fell flat. He rubbed at his arm again, and something in him itched for some sort of gesture, some sort of seal-

Oh. Like that.

He extended his hand to her and met her eyes, grinning "Deal?"

Wendy chuckled a bit, taking his hand in her "Yeah man, deal."

As they took eachother's hands for the pact, blue fire erupted from their intertwined fingers. Bip squealed out his shock, recoiling at the fire that persisted on his fingertips. At the licking flames, Bip yelped again, shaking his hand wildly in the air to extinguish the flames. When it was left without fire and burns, he sighed in relief. Then jumped again.

"Aw, shi- You okay, Wendel?" He stammered.

Wendy was staring at her hand, which she had also taken back when the flames erupted. She studied it a moment hen gave a nod "Well, I'm not burned or hurt or anything." She shrugged, then smiled at him "Dude, you can use that power of yours to roast some wicked marshmallows."

Bip stared at her, baffled. Then snapped, throwing his arms up in the air "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOUR PRIORITIES!?"

"What's wrong with yours? Marshmallows are good." She smirked. Bip stared at her again before sliding a hand down his face, annoyed.

* * *

He wasn't so fond of wreaking chaos after that. So he bid Wendy a quick and awkward farewell and went back to his Great Uncle. Who was looking quite annoyed and reeked vaguely of tomatoes.

"Sup, Stanio-Mio?" Bip said, leaning on the contraption his uncle was stuck in.

"Oh, nothing, just BORED OUT OF MY MIND." Stan growled "Kid, where the heck have you been!?"

Bip shrugged "Tying people's shoes together and pushing people down stairs. Where have you been?"

Stan gave him a sharp glare "Where do ya think?"

Bip made a show of stroking at his chin, looking up thoughtfully "Hmmmm…. Vegas, perhaps? Maybe Mexico?"

Stan ground his teeth, glaring at the child, his growl wildly twitching at the corners.

* * *

 **A/N**

 **How'd you like that chapter? I think it was fun.**

 **Next chapter's gonna look into why Bip wandering off from Dipper and Mabel is so common. Hope you look forward to it.**

 **Post A/N Scene:**

That night, Bip once again stared at the ceiling. His insomnia robbing him of sleep. Seeing colors for people's emotions…That was just something people wrote about. That was just something really pretentious artists would talk about. You couldn't actually do it.

Right?

Well, casting a glance to either one of his siblings, he doubted it. Mabel was a soft yellow, Dipper a cool gray. Whatever adventure they had that day, they surely enjoyed.

Bip pressed his hands to his forehead in an attempt to suppress an oncoming migraine.

Eventually, he fell asleep.


	10. Chapter 10

**The Time Traveler's Pig**

"Step right up, Ladies and Gentlemen!" Yelled Bip, mimicking his Uncle's stance of presenting his crudely made attraction. He sported a bedazzled windbreaker today, replaced the slippers with sneakers, and slapped on an extra hat (a fez) that was laying around the place. The colors of his close, from up to down, were maroon, pink, black, and blue. In short: he looked like a mess.

However, his tacky attire did attract several of the Mystery Fair's attendants.

"Hello hello hello!" He greeted, grinning widely. He dipped his head, allowing his hat to roll down his arm and to be caught in his waiting hand. Bip held it up to his assembling audience. "Wanna see something AMAZING? Only five dollars, and you will!"

This declaration brought about a song of 'Ooohs' and 'Aaahs' from the crowd. One by one, they all approached the boy and deposited their money into his hat. The boy put the hat back onto his head and lead them to his attraction. An upside down cardboard box with the word 'Amazing' written on it in a messy scrawl.

"Behold!" He grinned, motioning to the single thing on the box. A tortoise. More specifically, Mr. Turtle. Just that.

…

"WHAT A RIP OFF!"

"I WANT MY MONEY BACK!"

Several, similar, cries and shouts rung out as Bip grinned broadly, standing proud and unfazed.

"Now, now." Bip tsked the assembled crowd, waggling a finger at them. "This isn't just your everyday tortoise."

The crowd quieted down, eyeing the boy skeptically. Bip leaned in closer "It's a magical tortoise."

Another series of 'oos' and 'aahs'. One cry of:

"HOW IS IT MAGICAL!?"

"That's just the thing!" grinned the boy "It….can get people to give it money!"

…

"WOW!"

"THAT _IS_ Amazing!"

Bip chuckled, bowing to his audience as they dispersed, apparently pleased with the spectacle. He took the hat off, counted the money, and smiled broadly.

"Idiots." He grinned. He rewarded his cuddly pet tortoise with a strawberry, and the shelled creature eagerly nom'd it down.

Once the tortoise had finished eating, he picked up his set up, setting Mr. Turtle firmly in his pocket, and trotted off to his next booth-station-thing. He repeated his routine, and soon had a generous hat filled with money.

His Uncle was putting on the cheapest Fair in history. Filled with safety hazards, health violations, and rip-off games. But the triplets all found their own things to do, that DIDN'T involve being killed- probably. Mabel had ran off to win a pig, Dipper was trying to impress Wendy, and Bip was scamming people. Frankly, he was getting bored. There was only so much fun you could have practically robbing people.

Bip rolled his shoulders back as he gave a hearty yawn. Rubbing at his eyes, he thought that perhaps it was time to turn in. Granted the sun was only just setting, but he hadn't slept that night….or the one before that, really.

He went to take a step

Things changed.

He was in mid-bow suddenly. Surprised, he jumped backwards, scrambling away from where he was standing as if it were toxic. Chest heaving, he drew his feet away from where he was standing. A crowd of people were walking away from where he was, and his back was pressed to the box where his tortoise stood. Mr. Turtle crawled up to his head, nipping at the boy's hair.

Sweat slicked down Bip's face. He couldn't stop shaking. What-

He looked around. The sun was back up, shining down from a blue sky. People were roaming about and chattering loudly as they milled about different stands and rides. The boy shuddered, hugging himself. This…was WEIRD. And usually he was fine with weird. When HE caused it.

Mr. Turtle had climbed entirely on his head and had fallen asleep.

Bip took another breath. He reached forward, getting onto his knees and then slowly stumbled back onto his feet. Dazed, he smacked his hands on either side of his face. This truly was Déjà vu at its finest. The boy shook his head, clutching at his chest. That was wrong. This wasn't Déjà vu. This was happening again.

"But….how the hell would I know this?" he muttered to himself. He rolled his eyes and dusted off his pants and straightened his jacket. "Not gonna think 'bout this, Bippity." He mumbled to himself "It's not important-"

Reality suddenly skipped.

"Wha-Uh-" He twitched. One eye flashed yellow as his pupil flattened into a slit. And through the corner of that eye he saw… Not quite sure.

The air….glitched? Being ripped apart and thrown off into non-existence. Then, the pieces were replaced and sewn together as if it were stitching itself back together after being torn apart. And the pieces fell back together, people were placed back to where they once were, earlier. And as the scene replaced itself, the people once again began to move. He felt pushed against something-

And he was in mid-bow.

Bip grimaced, shaking his head.

"Okay, fine!" He snorted. He scooped up his tortoise and stormed off. He snapped at no one, so the people around him parted to avoid him "I'll figure out what's going on! Damn!"

Bip snooped around a minute or two, looking around corners and avoiding people as much as possible.

He couldn't quite find what he wanted until the next time things glitched out. Then, he saw the only other solid thing- only TWO other solid thing _s_. Bip's lips twitched up, baring his teeth that he grinded against one another.

Dipper and Mabel.

"What else did I expect?" He growled.

When things settled again, he looked for his siblings. Mabel ran off, right past where he hid peering around a booth selling corndogs or something. Toward the…pig pen. Bip rolled his eyes. Of course she'd want to win the pig over and over. He shifted his attention over to his brother.

Dipper was at a game booth with Wendy, and by the way he shifted and fidgeted and threw at a ridiculous angle, it could be concluded that this was a re-do of a previous failure. Which…happened again? The ball he threw hit Wendy right in the eye, and Robbie showed up and asked her out-

"Seriously?" Bip murmured, raising an eyebrow. "For WENDY? He has time travel and he uses it to try to get with WENDY?" He tightened his grip on the corner of the stand, clawing grooves into its surface. "And what? He let Mabel into this and not me? Did he not think I was IMPORTANT enough!?" He swallowed down his urge to yell, allowing it to instead flush his face red with rage. His voice trembled off into an unsteady hiss "Did Mabel not think to tell him? Did-" he choked a moment "Does Mabel NOT care?"

Watching Dipper grumble and run off to Mabel (in the company of her pig) pushed his anger over the edge. But, he grinned. Widely.

"Okay, okay. FINE." He whispered "Y'wanna play Time-Travel? We'll play Time-Travel."

They went back again. Bip sprinted like hell to where he saw Dipper last time. And there he was again. Peering with calculating eyes to throw the ball, win the weird stuffed animal, and NOT hit Wendy. Bip shifted his weight, preparing for another wild dash. Dipper threw a ball, it missed the bottles, hit the wall, then flew to Wendy's face.

Bip had to move VERY quickly, but he still managed. He snatched the ball out of mid-air, right before it hit Wendy's eye.

"Wow, that almost hit you." He smiled pleasantly at her.

"Dude, that wasWICKED cool." Wendy chuckled. "Nice reflexes. Saved me a black eye."

"Sure." Bip shrugged, tossing the ball over his shoulder. He hadn't quite PLANNED for it, but the ball hit the bottle tower and sent them spiraling downwards. This apparently counted as a win, and the man handed Wendy the strangest frickin stuffed animal ever.

"Oh man!" Wendy grinned, hugging the thing. "Dude, that was SO cool!"

Bip shrugged, smirking smugly "What can I say? I'm amazing."

Wendy laughed and ruffled his hair "Sure are, dude."

Bip laughed, peering around her to see Dipper's jaw on the ground and his eyes wide. He then swallowed something down, twitched angrily, and took a breath as his face flushed red.

Robbie trotted over "Hey Wendy-"

"Dude, look at this thing Bip won me!" Wendy grinned, holding up the stuffed animal "It was SO cool! I mean, the ball almost hit me in the eye, and he just SNATCHED it out of mid-air and then like, casually tossed it over his shoulder and WON."

"Uh-Y-yeah." Robbie muttered, fuming."Whatever, you can't even tell what species it is." He turned on heel and stormed off.

"Dude. What's his problem?" Wendy muttered.

Bip shrugged "Maybe he wanted one."

Wendy laughed, lightly shoving him "Well, WIN him one, dumb-dumb!"

Bip chuckled "Nah. I mean… Yo Dips, can ya get me another ticket?"

"Wha- yeah, sure, whatever." Dipper mumbled, shoving a few crumpled dollars his way. He shoved his hands in his pockets and trudged off the opposite way, mumbling.

"Dude." Wendy frowned "What's his problem?"

Bip shrugged, grinning widely and suppressing a snicker "Probably ticked off I keep 'borrowing' money from him."

Wendy rolled her eyes again "Man, y'gotta pay him back eventually."

"WHAT!?" Bip gasped, motioning to himself "The fact that you imply I wouldn't OFFENDS me!"

"Your face offends me." Wendy said with a smirk.

"Well" Bip sighed, dropping his arms to his sides "That really fortifies my self-esteem."

She laughed again, and while she was preoccupied, Bip allowed himself a devilish smirk as he tracked his brother's movement away.

 _Playtime had just begun, Pine Tree._

* * *

"It was so WEIRD, Mabel!" Dipper said, pacing back and forth "I mean, why did that suddenly change? Why did BIP suddenly get involved in this?"

"Who knows?" Mabel shrugged. She smiled mischievously, waggling her eyebrows "Maybe the Universe would prefer BIP getting with Wendy over YOU."

"W-what! No way!" Dipper flushed.

"Oh, c'mon! Lighten up!" She snickered, turning her attention back to squishing Waddles's face "I mean, it was probably just a fluke, right? Just do it again."

"Yeah, yeah!" Dipper said, fiddling with the time-tape "We'll just do it again."

"That's the spirit DipDops!" Mabel grinned "Let's do it!"

So they re-did it.

Bip, once again appearing out of nowhere, swatted the ball away with a frying pan.

Rewind.

This time he came up with a tennis racket, knocking the ball away and into the bottles.

Rewind.

Again, Bip showed up.

Again and Again and Again, the third sibling showed up to somehow deflect or block the ball that seemed destined to hit Wendy in the face. For every try, there was some new way he came up with. Always smiling, so oddly contently.

"…Factor in cotton candy…" Dipper muttered to himself. He scribbled all over a cart selling popcorn, calculating with a rather impressive array of formulas "…and then factor in Bip-"

"Yeah, factor in Bip." Muttered a voice they didn't expect. Dipper jumped half a mile, turning on heel to see his brother glowering at waved.

"Hi Bippity-"

"HI." He snapped harshly, causing her to flinch.

"Dude, what the heck-" Dipper yelled at him.

"What the heck!?" Bip repeated, grinning almost sadistically. "WHAT THE HECK! Yeah, what the heck! Why the hell is it, whenever you two go off on some grand adventure of some sort, y'never think to, I don't know, ask if I want in?"

"What?" Mabel frowned, burrowing her hand into her skirt pocket "What do you mean-"

"The whole TIME-TRAVEL thing!?" Bip spat.

"Wha-" Dipper stared "W-wait, you knowabout that!?"

"Well, DUH!" Bip hissed, throwing his arms up in the air "Why the HELL did you think I was messing you up all those times!?"

"How did you even REMEMBER!?" Dipper retorted sharply.

"I dunno, maybe the same way you FORGOT ABOUT ME!"

"WHAT ARE YOU YELLING ABOUT!?"

Mabel fidgeted, watching the two yelling and yelling, drawing attention but pushing people away. From a bit away, she could even see Stan and Soos staring, Wendy frowning. She took a step forward, but then hesitated. Mabel didn't bother watching the rest. She got in between her brothers.

"CALM DOWN!" She snapped.

They shut up, but still glared at each other. Mabel sighed.

"Bip, please just skip the cryptic bologna and just TELL us what's up." She said.

Bip opened his mouth, then closed it. Then turned and crossed his arms over his chest.

"I….You guys are just….y'know, always finding cool adventures and stuff." He mumbled, kicking up dirt "And you just kinda…leave me out?"

Dipper stared. "Oh, dude….." He sighed, rubbing the back of his neck "We….We do kinda leave you out of a lot of things…..huh?"

Mabel fidgeted "…Sorry." The downcast look on her face was a bit more than this situation called for…. Her grip loosened on whatever she was holding in preference to fiddling with her hair.

Bip frowned too. He sighed, shoving his hands in his pockets. "I….I uh….." He fidgeted "….maybe that's my fault."

"Wha?" Mabel blinked as Dipper stared.

Bip fidgeted but didn't answer. Dipper frowned, blinked, then forced a smile as he clapped his brother's shoulder.

"Dude, I know you like to be alone sometimes. But that…that doesn't mean we shouldn't at least ASK you if you want in." he said.

Bip snorted, smirking bitterly "So you leaving me out is also just you respecting my privacy?"

"Kind of, yeah!" Mabel chirped, hooking her arms around both of her brothers' shoulders. "So how 'bout we go back in time, like, five minutes so we could avoid all the awkward stares we're getting right now?"

Bip, suddenly aware of all the eyes in their direction paled considerably. "Er…y-yeah. Yo, Dips?"

"On it."

Rewind.

* * *

 **A/N**

 **Gosh this took a long time to update. I was just trying SO hard to find a way to fit in Mabel's subplot with Waddles but I just couldn't….get it. BUT I will make sure Mabel gets more focus! 'Cause I love Mabel! I AM Mabel! MWAHAHAHA**

 **Also? Have you ever thought 'Golly Gee, I wish I can read more about Bip in between updates'? Well, now you can! Introducing, a seriesof short one-shots on this same profile, 'Bip's Blog'!**

 **Post A/N Sccene:**

"So we gotta pig now?" Bip said, poking the pig's face.

"Yeah!" Mabel grinned "I call him Waddles 'cause he WADDLES!"

Bip grinned widely "That makes sense!"

"It really doesn't." Dipper muttered with his nose in a book.

"Yeah it does." Mabel grinned "Doesn't it , Waddles?"

"YES IT DOES, MABEL" 'Waddles' said.

"OH MY GOODNESS HE TALKS." Bip squeaked, ducking behind Dipper and staring wide-eyed. "Brother the pig talks."

"Sure does, Bip." Dipper rolled his eyes.

"DUCK!" Mabel randomly yelled, chucking the pig over her head like a volleyball and decking Dipper in the face.

"Shouldn't you have said 'Pig'?" Bip smirked as Dipper twitched.


	11. Chapter 11

"Bip, dude, you gotta help me!" Dipper pled, grabbing his brother by the shoulders. His teeth chattered as he yelled "Robbie wants to FIGHT ME!"

"So what?" Bip shrugged. "It's _Robbie._ " Bip chuckled, brushing his bangs out of his face "His arms are even noodly-er than yours."

"Bip!"Dippper exclaimed, throwing his arms up in the air "This is serious! Robbie's gonna _kill_ me!"

"How?" Bip asked, quirking an eyebrow "Is he gonna whine you to death?"

"Yeah, Dipper." Mabel chirped, hopping off of her chair and skipping over to the boys "It's just Robbie. He won't hurt you too bad."

Bip nodded along to their sister's words, 'mhhm'ing at every bob.

"Kid, listen" Stan interjected, shuffling the deck of cards laid out in front of him "You can either face him like a man, or hide indoors like a wimp. Which is it gonna be?"

Dipper swallowed, his face paling the same time a red blush rose to his cheeks. Sweat pouring off of his face in sheets, he blurted out "SoosWeShouldGoToTheArcadeLikeAllDay!"

"Er….okay dude." Soos blinked, wringing his fingers.

"GreatLet'sGo." Dipper stammered out, gripping Soos's wrist and dragging him out the door.

"But it's _ROBBIE."_ Bip muttered, rolling his eyes.

(insert theme song here)

"Hey, Bip!" Mabel chirped, standing on her tip-toes to get closer to the third triplet's hammock. Bip, tearing himself from his reading, turned down to look at his sister.

"Hey Mabes." He greeted, flipping over onto his stomach "Whaddup?"

"UP!" Mabel grinned, she waved her hands around in the air as she continued "I'm going to help Stan get over his fear of heights. Wanna help?"

"Ew…help?" Bip muttered. He sighed, leaning on one arm as he supposedly thought it over. His conclusion was a shrug "Y'know what? Sure." He hopped down to the ground, stumbling only a little bit. With a slight melodramatic swipe of his hands, he dusted off his windbreaker. "I'm not doing anthing else today."

"Sweet!" Mabel grinned, she leaned in close to her brother and dropped her voice into a whisper "Okay,s o here's my plan…."

She told him.

Bip laughed "Uh….Y'think Stan's that chill about being blindfolded?"

"I dunno." Mabel said with a shrug "But that's my plan."

Bip rolled his eyes "Y'know what, good 'nough. Sure, let's do it to it."

"Yeah!" Mabel cheered, pumping a fist "Operation Get Stan Over His Fear of Heights starts NOW!"

And to Bip's surprise, the plan actually worked pretty well. How they managed to get Stan to climb a ladder blindfolded is beyond his understanding. The old man seemed pretty calm about it to, as if this was a normal occurrence.

They got to the top of the water tower, all according to Mabel's plan. Then, when she instructed Stan to take off his blindfold, Bip felt a shudder go through his spine at the old man's reaction. His entire body tensed up, his shoulders rose with a shaking breath and he immediately lurched to clutch onto the railing of the tower.

"You're doing great!" His sister's optimism was a mystery "Now let go of the railing…."

"Nope!" Stan managed to choke out. Bip rolled his eyes, clambering up onto the railing and making a show of performing several spins on a single foot.

"See, Stan?" He chirped, hopping to switch feet "Nothin' to worry 'bout here."

"KID, this thing is on STILTS!" Stan snapped, tightening his grips with only a brief glance spared to Bip "Yer gonna fall and break yer neck!"

"Oh, please" Bip dismissed the man's concern with a wave of his hand "What's the likelihood I'm gonna FALL?"

"Yeah, Grunkle Stan!" Mabel chirped, knocking onto the wooden railing of the tower "See? Sturdy as anything." She blinked suddenly, scrunching up her face in disgust "Does anyone smell body spray? And hormones?"

"How do you smell hormones?" Bip asked, absent-mindedly walking along the rail.

"You'd be surprised." Mabel said with a light shrug. Just then, Robbie decided to show up. Bip groaned as Mabel spat "Get your own water tower!"

"K-keep it down, he'll hear you!" Robbie stammered, frantically waving the girl down.

"Who'll hear us-" Bip began, being interrupted by a loud, but not quite grammatically correct voice. He skipped around to the side of the tower, staring down to see that video game character Dipper had brought to life- "Oh shit." Bip gulped.

"Bip, Language." Mabel chided "What's wr- AH!" She yelped as the entire tower shifted with a sickening crack of wood from down below. The sudden swing of the platform threw Bip off of the tower's railing, sending him spiraling downwards.

"WAH-!" He cried, flailing his arms as if to stop his descent. His heart dropped in his chest, feeling as if it were pulled faster than the rest of his body. But his fall was abruptly cut short by a firm hand wrapped around the back of his shirt.

"I got ya, kid!" Stan howled, still trying not to look down. Mabel had stumbled too, as apparent to her clinging onto the railing. She peered down at Bip, concern evident in her eyes and her own person as she crawled forwards, reaching down along with Stan to drag Bip back up to the platform.

Robbie had fallen or something, it really wasn't too big a deal.

Bip clung onto Stan's arm like a koala, suddenly unable to blink as he stared intently at nothing. Mabel sighed, pressing her back to the tower and wiping one sleeve across her forehead. Back on the ground, there was loud noise followed by a pixelated version of a fist explosion. Nothing to be curious about, really.

After things calm down, Stan patted himself over, grinning vividly.

"I'm- I'm alive!" He grinned "Take THAT world! Stan Pines is over his fear of heights!" He flexed his arms as said this, puffing out his chest in a display of pure confidence. But out of the corner of his eye he saw one of the triplets still clinging onto his arm, and on the other side of him was a the eldest of the children clawing desperately into the tower. Stan blinked. "Oh boy, you two scared of heights now?"

They both gave a mute nod.

Stan sighed "All right, all right. I'll get you two down…Hold on." He stooped down to scoop up Mabel, who clutched onto him tightly upon being picked up. Bip, already attached to his arm, was in no need of being picked up. Armed with two small children clinging onto him, Stan managed to clamber down from the water tower. Upon making impact with the ground, Mabel dropped to it with a sigh of relief.

"Thanks, Grunkle Stan!" She chirped, then her grin widened "You got over your fear of heights! That's great!"

"Sure did, sweetie." Stan grinned back, ruffling her hair. He snorted, glaring Bip down "Er….we're on the ground, kid."

"Yep." Bip choked out, tightening his grip. Stan and Mabel exchanged a look. Then, Stan squatted down onto the ground, trying to pry Bip off crow-bar style as Mabel wrapped her arms around the boy's waist and gave a hearty heave. With the work of both of them, they managed to dettatch Bip.

"Er….you okay, kid?" Stan asked after a moment.

"Yep." Bip said quickly, jerking straight up "Who said I wasn't okay? I'm always fine!" He grinned, swinging his arms back and forth followed by a quick stretch. He put his hands on his hips "Weird for me to be so freaked out though. I mean, I jump down from a hammock every day, so-"

"Woah, woah" Stan interrupted, raising his hand up "You _JUMP_ down from that? Wouldn't it make more sense to use a ladder?"

"Yeah." "Probaby." Bip and Mabel said simply, each of them blinking obliviously. Stan rubbed a hand against his face.

"Okay, okay. You kids are weird. I should've expected this." He sighed. "Well, let's get going home, you little rugrats." He ruffled their heads as he said this, grinning as Bip swatted at his hands while Mabel simply giggled at her brother's response.

The three of them went on their way.

"Hey, what was your brother doing today?" Stan asked as they walked.

"He just brought a video game character to life, is all." Bip shrugged.

"I wonder how that went for him?" Mabel said, tilting her head slightly.

They got home, saw Dipper with a blackeye, and concluded it did not go so well.

"Well, at least you didn't have to fight Robbie." Bip grinned awkwardly, shrugging his shoulders.

* * *

Mabel woke up when something went thump in the night. Rubbing at her eyes, she sat herself up just in time to see the door to their bedroom close quietly with a _click._ Blinking, Mabel took a quick inventory of the people in the room. Just herself and Dipper….

She got to her feet, quickly pulled on her flats, and sped-walked after Bip into the night. She followed him until he had gone outside in his pajamas (pretty much shorts and a tanktop) and his slippers. Then, when her heart sunk all of a sudden, Mabel suddenly shifted her priorities. She ran back upstairs as quietly as she was able, feeling along in the dark under her bed until her searches produced the blue amulet. She gulped, pocketed the pendant, and raced back outside.

Bip was just a speck on the graying horizon, and getting further and further away. Mabel sprinted to catch up with him but found he moved too quick for that to happen anytime soon. The world was a pretty solid grayscale when they arrived at their apparent destination. The leaning water tower.

Mabel climbed as fast as she could up the ladder after her brother, trying to shout out but finding her voice caught in her throat. The pendant was in her pocket, she reminded herself.

She got to the top, and saw Bip simply…sitting.

"Er….Heya." Mabel greeted, trotting over to him. Bip jumped with a bit of a start, staring at her with wide eyes before realization flashed through them and he relaxed.

"Heya Sister." Bip said, tilting his head "What are you doing up so early?"

"I could ask the same thing about you, dum-dum!" Mabel chirped as she gave him a playful shove.

Bip rolled his eyes, rubbing his arm where she pushed him "Just admirin' the view and all."

"You almost died here earlier." Mabel reminded him, pouting ever so slightly.

"Yeah, I know." Bip said. He turned his eyes back out over the town "But it's pretty up here, isn't it?"

Mabel blinked and followed his gaze. He was right. The sleepy small town was coated in gray, the buildings looking like toys over a field of grass and nested into the mountains. Long shadows crept from the base of each building, stretching towards them with a gentle desire.

Mabel grinned "Just sitting up here makes me feel like I could just fly right off!"

"I know." Bip chirped, smiling "But….y'know, gravity."

" _LAME!"_ Mabel pouted, pushing her cheeks together so air came rushing out. Bip laughed.

"Yeah, yeah. Gravity sucks." He smiled "Y'know, if it were up to me, we wouldn't hafta worry about that kind of thing" his eyes began to shine as the sun peeked over the horizon "We wouldn't be restricted by _anything_! Nothing but ourselves holding us back from everything we could do!"

Mabel grinned back "That sound so cool!" She stood up suddenly, forgetting her newly developed fear in favor of pointing over to a grove of trees "Like I'd make those trees over their grow marshmallows!"

"And I'd make clouds out of cotton candy!" Bip chirped "And the water would be Cola, and the grass would be made of gummy worms."

"And the dirt is actually CHOCOLATE SPRINKLES!" Mabel squealed happily "That would be SO awesome!"

"Yeah it would!" Bip grinned. They petered off into silence, looking out over the town as their visions of the world controlled by them formed in front of their eyes. The sun slowly crept up.

"But, seriously" Mabel said, looking at her brother "Why are you out here right now?"

Bip sighed with a shrug "I…just couldn't sleep, y'know?"

"Oh. Okay." Mabel said, smiling softly "Sorry, I just saw you wandering off and I….Just." She shrugged.

"Yeah, I get it." Bip muttered, rolling his eyes "You really should be used to the weird things I do by _now_."

"Yeah, yeah I should." Mabel said. Her eyes went back to watching the sunrise. It slowly peeked over the small town, casting its orange light along the ground and surface of every wall and stone, setting the shadows ablaze with their own darkness and a shine on the side of every object it touched. The sky around it turned pink, being dyed with the Sun's glow. Clouds drifted by.

"I don't mind this world, though." Mabel said with a smile "It's pretty in its own way."

Bip frowned "…I guess it is."

* * *

 **A/N**

 **Wow that took forever to update. Hope you guys liked this chapter. I'm quite proud of it, myself.**

 **Leave a review if you'd like.**

 **Post A/N Scene**

Bip stands next to a machine in the arcade, whistling in an attempt to look casual. Upon looking around the place and making sure no one he knew was around, he quickly spun around and entered the cheat code that got Dipper in such trouble earlier.

"Select your character!" The machine asked loudly, Bip winced, stole another glance around, then grinned.

"Shinata McKickButt!" He grinned.

A long, pink-haired character kicked her way into existence, the ribbons wrapped around her body swirling majestically with her every breathe. Her maroon bangs over shadowed her one shining eyes as she looked up at the boy.

Bip grinned "Sweeeeett."

Then they made muffins. Mabel helped.


	12. Chapter 12

**Little Dipper**

"Hey, Bip!" Dipper waved to him as Mabel scrunched her face up, analyzing the chessboard in a futile attempt to be a challenge. Dipper smiled as his brother as he headed for the door "Wanna play a round?"

"I'll pass." Bip muttered, throwing up the screendoor and trotting outside. He ignored the pouting snort of Dipper, shoving his hands deep into his pants' pockets. He hated it when Dipper got like this. A 'I always Win' mentality. And the worst part was, when you didn't play along with it, he'd be stuck in this sulky mood for the rest of the day.

So Bip just avoided Dipper when he's like that.

He trotted along the dirt path by himself, not stopping when he reached the town and only slowing as he reached the water tower. Rolling his shoulders, he hopped to cling onto a ladder rail and pulled himself up to the patio above. The structure was still leaning heavily on two stilts, the ominous creaking of the wood implying it might fall any second. Bip didn't pay mind to it, settling down on the wood and looking out over the town.

Bip smiled, sighing as he leaned into the breeze that ruffled his hair around his face. The sun was shining, the trees were a radiant green, the sky was blue and the clouds white. Swallowing, he forced himself to look downwards.

Immediately, his vision began to swim as his stomach lurched downwards. Bip pressed himself back against the tower, pressing his palm over his heart. And from the back of his mind whispered that ever pestering message….

 _Open the Portal_

 _Latrop eht Nepo_

He shook his head, smacking his hands against his scalp as if to beat out the chant. It was always there, almost a hum in the back of his mind. But lately it had let up, becoming white noise to his brain. But since he almost fell the other day…..

"Well, that's enough of that!" He chirped, shimmying down the ladder and stiffly walking away from the tower.

Reflecting on that kind of thing wasn't going to help anyway.

He trotted back to the Shack, picking up a stick and throwing it, then kicking along the dirt and rocks he came across. As he arrived at the shack, he saw Stan and Soos carrying a large bunch of mirrors through the door.

"Hey, kid!" Stan hollered as he spotted the boy.

"Whatever it is, no." Bip said curtly, trotting pass the two men.

"No you don't!" Stan snapped, grabbing the boy by his collar and pulling him backwards, shoving a the load of mirrors into his arms. Bip stumbled, struggling to keep a firm hold of them all as he glowered at Stan, murmuring profanity. Stan pointed down at him, one ballled fist on his hip "Just help Soos sets those up, got it?"

"Or!" bip grinned "I can just smash these on the ground just to piss you off!"

"Woah. Dude." Soos frowned "Er...watch the language, please."

"...Fine." Bip muttered, shouldering his load "I'll set these damn things up."

"Great." Stan said, turning on heel and striding to the car, where several more mirrors were strapped to the top of it. Bip, muttering things that are not too nice, followed Soos into the Shack and started to set up the mirrors in a hall he didn't even know the shack had.

Stan showed up eventually, carrying more of the mirrors. With a grumble and a shout or two at Bip and Soos, he also set mirrors up. (noticeably less than Soos did, but Bip also slacked off on that).

"Hey, where's the siblings?" Bip blinked, looking over his shoulder to the gift shop.

Stan threw his arms up in the air "I got no clue! Maybe they went after that Gideon kid."

Bip twitched "Gideon?"

"Yeah, dude." Soos said "The guy was here earlier, trying to steal the shack or something."

"And he FAILED." Stan grinned.

"Oh." Bip said flatly, trying to suppress the twitch that had taken over his left eye. He gripped a mirror, pressing his fingertips against the smooth glass. His knuckles turned white, but the glass didn't crack. He set the mirror down, stepped back-

His reflection was grinning at him. Slit-pupiled eyed glowing yellow. Bip's reflection waved, then pressed his hand against the mirror as if it were a window.

" _Hiya!"_ he chirped. _"Remember me?"_

Bip choked on his response. But his reflection grinned, leaning in closer.

" _Don't you have something to do, Bippity?"_ The eyes turned red _"Something important…?"_

 _Open the Portal_

"G-" Bip gulped, taking a step back. Soos looked up from his work, frowning at the boy.

"Er…..Dude-"

" _GET AWAY FROM ME!"_ Bip screamed, clutching at his scalp.

"Woah, Dude!" Soos yelped, abandoning the mirror he set up and sprinting over to him. Stan jumped, staring at the boy a moment before hesitantly making his way over. Soos was on his knees, eye-level to Bip as he tried to pull away. "Dude, dude, what's wrong?"

"Soos!" Stan snapped, pulling the handyman away "Don't get up in his face, it's not helping!"

Soos just stared at him helplessly.

Stan swallowed, then slowly moved to stand in front of the kid. The boy was curling in on himself, clutching his scalp, muttering something in an almost chant-like fashion. Stan opened his mouth, prepared to say something when the bell of the gift shop rang. Stan growled, glaring at the entrance, but instantly relaxing at the sight of his only other official employee.

"Wendy!" Stan snapped. Wendy blinked, staring at him a moment before trotting over.

"What's up, Mr. Pines-" Wendy began before her eyes caught on Bip "Dude!" She slid over to him, landing on her knees. "What's wrong, Bip-?"

Bip stared at her a moment. He forced a smile "Oh, hey Wendel.."

"…hey, dude." Wendy said, forcing a smile "Something up?"

"Just havin' a panic attack, not much." Bip responded, shrugging ever so slightly.

…

"Cool." Wendy blinked "Wanna….like, go for a walk or something? Calm you down?"

…"sure." Bip nodded stiffly. He rubbed the back of his neck while his body trembled. Then, he apologized to Soos with a stiff pat on his arm and shot Stan a look that was something between a glare and a stare.

Wendy smiled, a bit tightly, and gripped Bip's arm, dragging him out of the Shack with a glance at Stan. Soos and Stan exchanged a look. One that was cut short as Stan smack Soos across the shoulders with a harsh bark of "Get back to work!"

Wendy let go of Bip once they were a good distance away. Though they both stayed silent for quite a long time, Bip trudging along with his hands in his pockets.

"So….what was that about?" Wendy asked.

"Nuthin'." Bip muttered.

"Dude, I ain't stupid." Wendy said, rolling her eyes.

"I know!" Bip snapped, turning on heel to glare at her. He threw his arms down "I know! I know, okay! I know you're not stupid! I know you can see right through me! And you know WHAT!?" He cut himself off, panting heavily "That has NEVER happened before! NO ONE can see through me! Not even my parents! Not even my SIBLINGS! I-I-" He choked on his words, sputtering out a cough or two. Wendy blinked, taken aback.

"Woah, Bip….uh….Breathe." She patted him on the back "Calm down, man. Breathe, breathe…."

"I'm okay." Bip sighed "….I'm fine, Wendy….I'm good."

"Are you?"

"Bwahahaha! No!" Bip laughed, wiping at his eyes "Wendy, listen, I- I," he took a breath "I got some issues."

"…I gathered." Wendy blinked, tilting her head "And the evil clone probably didn't help."

"Nope." Bip sighed. He pressed his palms to his face "Look, I'm sorry, okay? I didn't mean to freak you all out earlier. I just…" He sighed again.

"Dude, dude, look at me." Wendy said. Bip did, reluctantly. Wendy put her hands on his shoulders and forced a smile. "It'll be okay. We're not mad at you, we just are worried-"

"But I don't WANT you to worry!" Bip snapped.

"…Why?"

Bip turned away. Wendy frowned.

"Bip. Dude. Why?"

"…I don't want to answer that." Bip muttered. Wendy sighed, pulling the boy into a hug. Bip stared, wide eyed over the teen's shoulder. "Er….awkward friend hug?"

"Awkward friend hug, dude." Wendy chuckled.

Bip chuckled back, stiffly returning the hug before pushing her away. He smiled.

"I…er….feel a bit better." He said, stammering a bit.

Wendy flashed a smile "You're welcome."

"Heh."

"Heh."

They stood there awkwardly for a few minutes. But thundering footsteps soon interrupted their standing there, shaking the ground and trees. Birds flew from their perches in a panicked frenzy.

"W-what is THAT!?" Bip snapped, bouncing along with the shaking of the ground.

"I don't know, man!" Wendy yelled, spreading her feet to get better balance.

The thundering footsteps grew closer and closer, before a tall, large, minotaur with huge biceps leapt from the brush.

"AAAAAAAHHHH!" He screamed as he hopped.

"Ahhh!" "WHAT THE HELL DON'T EAT ME!" Wendy and Bip hollered in unison.

"I'm not going to EAT you!" The beast yelled "I'm a MANotaur not a….uh… MAN-EATERataur!"

"Er…" Wendy blinked.

"Well….That's good." Bip blinked. He put his hands in his pockets, rocking back and forth on the balls of his heels. "So….what are you doing here?"

"I heard someone CRYING!" The Manotaur snapped. "Which is UN-MANly!"

"H-hey!" Bip stammered, a light pink blush coming to his cheeks. "That wasn't CRYING-"

"Kind of was, man." Wendy interjected.

"WENDY! SHUDDUP!" Bip whined, flailing his arms about.

"Ha!" The Manotaur chortled, throwing out his chest "You call yourself a MAN!?"

"I call myself 'Bip' actually." He muttered.

"My point is, you're super UN-MANLY!" The beast mocked, jabbing a finger to the boy. Bip's blushed intensified.

"'Un-manly'?" He repeated "I'm not UN-MANLY, I'm, like, super manly."

"Not really." Wendy shrugged.

"You're not helping, Wendel." Bip muttered.

"Sorry man."

"My point being!" The Manotaur interrupted. He tapped one hoof impatiently "You are definelty not a MAN! So I'm here to offer you repention!"

"Er….Don't you mean redemption?" Bip corrected.

"When you're a MAN, you have no time for GRAMMAR!"

"How about MAN-ners?" Bip scowled.

"NO!"

"Well, okay then."

"So….yes,about your MAN-redemption" The Manotaur said, stroking at his beard "We need you to preform the ultimate of MANly deeds!"

"Yelling MAN really obnoxiously?" Bip asked.

"NO!"

"Oh."

"Anyway, to regain your MAN-liness, you must beat ME at an ARM-WRESTLING contest!"

"What if I don't care?" Bip blinked.

The Manotaur leaned in real close, still combing his fingers through his beard. He 'hummed' very loudly. "…I think you do care."

"But I don't." Bip said.

"Man, just do it." Wendy muttered "Otherwise he won't leave us alone."

"Yes! Listen to the NOT MAN." The beast hollered in Bip's face. Bip, an extremely annoyed expression plastered to his face, wiped off the saliva that had splatted onto his cheeks.

"Okay, okay, fine. If it'll shut you up."

"YEAH! THEN! TO THE MAN-ATORIUM!"

Then in a scene transition that works in cartoons but not so much when written, as the Manotaur yelled, the camera zooms out to reveal they are already AT the Manatorium. However, this is fanfiction, and I can't animate it however much I want to. Not due to any legal issues, just because animating takes too long and I have the attention span of a walnut.

The Manatorium was just like any old roman coliseum, a large circle of stone with sand thrown haphazardly into the middle of it. Hundreds of other MANotaurs sat in the benches the surrounded the sand, hollering and hooting and pumping their fists in the air.

"Woah!" Bip stared "H-how'd- What-"

"Er….something wrong, Bip?" Wendy asked.

"…Nothing."

Wendy shrugged. The Manotaur squatted down next to a small wooden table, patting to motion to the boy to sit opposite of him. Bip did, hesitantly, eyeing the large muscular arm of the creature. He gulped and took his hand in the Manotaur's much, MUCH larger one.

There was a ring of a gong and suddenly, Bip felt him arm smashed into the table top, splintering it into pieces.

"Gah!" Bip screamed, rubbing at his arm. "Ow…..ow ow ow…"

"Dude!" Wendy snapped, stepping towards the MANotaur "That was bit MUCH, wasn't it?"

"There's NEVER too much when you're a MAN!" The Manotaur declared. The audience cheered and hollered their agreement. Wendy sneered.

"All right, all right. My turn, then."

"But you are not a MAN!" The Manotaur snapped. Wendy rolled her eyes, planted a booted foot on his stomach, wrapped one arm around the elbow of the beast, and pulled downwards with a sickening _SNAP_ that left the beast writhing in pain, gripping at his arm. Wendy dusted her hands off, walked over to Bip, and scooped him up, flinging him over her shoulders and strutting off.

The audience was dead silent.

And thus, Wendy the Annihilator made her name known.

* * *

 **A/N**

 **I love Bip and Wendy's friendship. It's just so interesting to me.**

 **BTW, This story is now on Quotev! Under the same title, but published by 'Flippersmit'.**

 **Post A/N Scene**

"Hey guys…" Bip sighed, pushing open the screendoor with his masculinity shattered "I'm b-…" He stopped, staring at the spectacle in front of him.

A tiny Soos was sitting comfortably in Mabel's cupped hands, as Dipper's face was scrunched up in concentration whil gluing shards of….something, back together.

Bip blinked "….Do I wanna know?"

"Probably not."

"Nope."


End file.
